Bang Gang

What’s this about a dodgy sex party at Lorraine’s house? You going?

She took ages to reply. Work. She was at work. No fucking need to panic.

I scrabbled for my phone as it pinged.

Ha! She told you?! Christ, word spreads. Yeah, I’ll be there. Me and Tonya. I think she’s invited quite a few!

I stared at it in shock. Just fucking stared.

Another ping.

Are you coming?!

Like fuck I was fucking coming.

Not quite my fucking scene, Jo. I couldn’t stop the anger. Have a good fucking time though.

I waited. And waited.

I’m only going to let my hair down. Lorraine’s been funny lately. You know what she’s like about you. Thought it would be a good bonding experience.

I was fucking flabbergasted.

I fired off a text to Lorraine.

You can keep Jodie out of your seedy fucking shit. Just fuck off, Lorraine.

A reply in a heartbeat.

Aww, diddums. You’re welcome to join us. I’m sure Jodie won’t mind. xxx

I tried to clear my head. Tried to get my thoughts around this shit.

We said no fucking gangbangs. I told her that. I told her she wasn’t on the fucking list.

I typed out a message.

What about us, Jo?

Sappy twat.

I pressed send anyway.

Her message didn’t take long.

It’s only one night, Darren. Ruby’s at Lea Nicholl’s house tomorrow evening, but Thursday works. Do you want to come over for tea? We need to talk. Good chance.

Another message. I might have some fresh ideas after Lorraine’s house. Should be fun, right? ;)

A wink. She sent me a fucking wink.

I nearly launched the phone through the fucking window.

That’s why you’re going, is it? For us? For some fresh ideas? Thought we were fine as we fucking were, Jo.

She sent another message back and I couldn’t believe it.

I thought you’d be pleased! Variety is the spice of life, Darren Trent, I thought you’d be well on board. x

Variety is the spice of fucking life?! I stormed on through to the garage, and the door flung on its hinges so hard everyone stopped working to look at me.

“A gig, Wednesday night, Lorraine’s house. Is that yours?”

They looked at each other, then Buck shrugged. “Yeah. Didn’t think you’d want in. She’s paying a fucking fortune, says it’s going to be quite a party.”

I could’ve fucking killed them. Every single one of them.

“Touch Jodie, even fucking look at Jodie, and don’t bother coming back to this fucking yard. Understand me?”

They didn’t know anything about it. It was clear as fucking day.

Buck stepped closer. “Jodie’s going? Why the fuck is Jodie going?”

“You tell me!” I barked. “This is Lorraine’s fucking work. All of it.”

“Christ,” Hugh said. “Really didn’t think that was on the cards…”

“You and me fucking both.” I stormed past them, lit up a cigarette. Buck followed me.

“What you gonna do about it?”

I didn’t answer.

“Shit, Trent, you’ve got to do fucking something. Tell her she’s not to fucking go! Tell her it’s fucking exclusive! Tell her Lorraine can get fucking stuffed!”

I shook my head. “I’m not fucking telling her what she can and can’t fucking do like some sappy fucking twat, Buck. She wants to ride the fucking Bang Gang train, that’s her business.”

She said she loved me.

“Don’t sit fucking right to me this,” he said. “Something’s well fucking off.”

“Yeah, that cunt Lorraine. That’s what’s fucking off about this whole fucking thing.”

“But Jodie doesn’t seem…”

I glared at him. “Happy enough to hand over four-hundred fucking quid to have a go, wasn’t she? Happy enough to hand it over a second time when I gave her a freebie, too. Of course she’s fucking going, Buck.”

“But you’re…”

“We’re what?!” I took a drag. “We’re fucking nothing, Buck. That’s perfectly fucking clear. I’m just a fucking cock to her, a cock who happens to be the father of her fucking kids.”

He slapped my shoulder and I was tense as fuck.

“Talk to her, Trent. Just fucking talk to her. Set this shit straight before it rips you a-fucking-part, man.”

Like fucking hell I’d talk to her.

I regretted every fucking thing I’d fucking said.

Soft fucking cunt. Sappy, naive fucking idiot.

Like she was gonna fucking have me back.

Of course she fucking wasn’t.

I was just a piece of fucking rough. Just like always. She wanted a Brian, and a quinoa-munching fucking suit who’d drive a fucking Aston Martin like a posh wanker.

Not me.

Of course she didn’t want me.

I got back to fucking work.

I got Ruby ready for her play date. Halloween. Christ, this year was zooming by. She wanted to go as one of the Transformers but I was hard pushed to find enough cardboard boxes to stand a chance of turning her into a truck-cum-robot. After a mini-tantrum we settled on a cat. She wore all black and I made her a little ear headband, stuffed a stocking with socks and pinned it to her leggings as a tail. It looked better than I’d expected.

A bit of makeup, some eyeliner whiskers and a pretty little pink nose and she looked cute as a button. I snapped some pictures and sent them off to Darren with a string of smiley faces.