The Blind Date

“What about your dad? Arielle always just said that you were more of a father to her than her sperm donor.” It’s as kind a quote as I can offer. Arielle has said some harsh things about her dad over the years.

“Me?” Noah says, looking surprised. But he doesn’t question it further. It seems more like he puts it away in his mental filing cabinet to take out and analyze later. With a shrug, he offers, “He left when I was a kid. I don’t even know how much Arielle remembers. We never talk about it, you know?”

I don’t know. My parents are still married decades after their vows, but I nod anyway.

Noah pauses, and at the next intersection he takes a right. We steer away from the interstate, and I wonder where he’s taking us. “My father walked out on us,” Noah says quietly, his eyes fixed straight ahead. “I was nine, and Arielle was six. After Arielle’s birth, the stress was bad. He and Mom would fight, usually over money because there was never enough. They tried to keep it away from us, so I don’t know all the details. But one Sunday, I woke up and he was gone. Other than an occasional child support check, we haven’t heard from him since. Honestly, I’m glad. Even if he was a part of what made me snap at you back then.”

“What do you mean?”

Noah makes another turn and accelerates a little. “Arielle had just turned eighteen, and we knew the rare child support payments would stop. They weren’t much and never frequent enough to count on, but they helped. So I knew Mom was losing that help, even though Arielle was still in high school, still living at home, and with dreams of college. It had me pissed. It wasn’t the whole reason I snapped, but it was part of it.”

The admission means a lot, and I feel closer to Noah now than I ever have. “And the rest? You said it was part of it.”

Noah glances over and takes a deep breath. “When River and I created Friendzone, I was so sure it was our ticket. That I’d be able to take care of myself, of my family. That Mom would be able to retire and finally not worry, and Arielle could become anything she wanted. Instead, I had a bit of money, but by the time River and I paid off the loans and investors, it wasn’t enough to go around the way I’d hoped, and I had to take a corporate job.”

“Yet you seem happy with your work now. River definitely does.”

Noah nods. “I do love my job. I have good people, good mentors, and yes, a damn good paycheck. But at the time, I was young, dumb, and broke. I was mad that you had this opportunity for school at your feet and planned to just walk away from it when my mom was working two jobs to split the cost of Arielle’s school with me. I was pissed that your dad was there, joking around and being all lovey-dovey with your mom, when mine had bailed. I was jealous of you for having the guts to try and make it on your own. But really, it had nothing to do with you. I hated what I saw as my own failure.”

“I don’t think you could’ve been a failure if you’d tried. It’s not who you are,” I assure him. “And thank you. For the full truth.”

“I’m still so sorry about what I said,” Noah says, looking over at me quickly before returning his eyes to the road.

I squeeze his hand, wanting to write the end of that chapter and move on to this one forever. “Can we agree that we’ve made our peace about that day? I never held a grudge because River said you were going through some family stuff and that it wasn’t about me. That doesn’t mean I didn’t think you were a rude asshole, but I understand now. Let’s leave the past in the past and see what the future might hold.”

Noah nods, and it feels like the beginning of something new, and that’s exciting. And looking over at Noah, I realize that he feels exactly the same way.

But dredging all of that up is a hell of a way to start a date.

“Where are you taking me, anyway?” I ask, hoping for a lighter topic.

“You’ll see.”

I relax into the seat, trusting that he’s got a plan, plus a back-up plan, and a back-up to the back-up. It’s who he is. Me? I could ride around all night and just stop when something caught my eye. But as my belly growls a little, I think maybe he’s got the better idea this time—a destination in mind with what I’m sure will be good food. Noah wouldn’t have it any other way.