The One I Want

During my first few days at work, we never ran into each other. I have no idea how luck was on my side, but it was a clean sweep for the week. So yeah, that we’re working in the same office will come as a surprise to him as well.

This whole friends thing adds extra complications.

I do the only thing that’s right. I march into work on Monday with a formal letter of resignation ready to send from my draft emails—one for the agency, who is really the only one I need to send it to, and one for Laurie, the head of HR at CWM. She’s been so supportive that I feel I owe her the personal courtesy.

The problem is, I’ve enjoyed this job. Having a routine and accomplishing daily tasks has been fun, and exceeding their expectations is exhilarating. I may not be professionally trained for the job, but I think I’ve done well at picking up the skills required. Even with the position extending for ten weeks, I had just adjusted the dread of anticipation to return. Now I’m full of doubts again. Did I knowingly sabotage myself?

Does it matter anymore?

No. I need to walk away before I sabotage my new friendship. I email Laurie, set the calls to go to the answering service, and head to the Cave before the bossman shows up. It’s a straight shot down the hall, but I look both ways just to make sure the coast is clear before I even step a foot through the main doors. I dash ahead but slow when I reach the other end of the walkway. I’m quick to study each plaque, finding Head of HR on the fourth door.

Knocking lightly, I wait to enter until I hear, “Come in.”

I spin inside, my back pressing to the door, and a sense of relief washes through me.

Laurie asks, “Is everything all right?”

“Yes,” I say, waving my hand like it’s no big deal. I don’t tell her I’m hiding from the CEO. That would just lead to questions for answers I don’t have. “I’m fine.” Approaching her desk, I continue, “I would like to speak with you about—”

“I just got your email.” She angles her chair toward me and rests her arms on the desk in front of her. “I’m kind of surprised. This is a temporary job. You said you’ve enjoyed being here when I checked in with you last Friday. I felt like it was a good fit so far. Do you mind me asking why you decided to leave? You don’t have to answer, of course, if you don’t want to. I’m just curious if you can help me fill in the blanks.”

I silently check off each point in my head.

The boss is sexy.

He’ll think I’m stalking him. Again. He’ll think I lied about knowing he works here.

I also, just by pure coincidence, live in the same building as him.

And finally, Andrew, aka Mr. CEO, and I are friends. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure he won’t get a kick out of the previous three points.

None of the above appear to be viable avenues to travel down when explaining the situation, so I take a more obvious route. “I do enjoy the office and most everyone I’ve met . . .” I don’t mention Justin or how he hangs around the front desk a little too long or makes me uncomfortable when he insists on showing me the new steno pads in the supply room. “I’m just not being challenged.”

“I was afraid of that.” If eyes could physically light up, hers do. “I’m also not upset to hear you say that. I know you’re overqualified for the position, but you’re very good at it.”

“I appreciate that.”

“Joseph and I were talking about offering you full-time employment, either up front or somewhere else in the office. We think you can find something challenging here at CWM that you’ll enjoy.” Leaning forward like an old friend, she says, “We want you to stay, Juni. You’re efficient at multitasking and personable on the phone and to coworkers. Our office never looked better, and you put care into everything you do. You’re special, and we would hate to lose you.”

“Full-time employment?” That’s not what I expected when I came here, and I’m not sure how it makes me feel.

“Yes. Is that something you’re interested in doing?”

I thought I already knew the answer. That’s why I sent the email. But now, hearing of the possibilities potentially changes things. My financial backing has allowed me to live life on my own terms and avoid getting involved in a job professionally. Dedicating my time and energy to professional pursuits did not turn out well once upon a time. When everyone counted on me most, I blew my chances at winning the grant my parents so desperately needed.