Finding Beauty in the Darkness

But then, when he hung up the phone, and we went back to watching our movie, Romeo and Juliet (Don’t act like you didn’t love the 1990s version with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes), and it got to the part where the families dueled, I jokingly asked him if that’s how it works in the mob. He threw his head back in laughter and told me he could see his brothers as Mercutio and Tybalt. I had no idea he had brothers. It’s obvious, Giovanni is an extremely private person.

When I grew tired and yawned several times, Giovanni grabbed a pillow and had me lay my head across his lap while he played with my hair. I fell asleep before the movie ended but woke up to him carrying me back to bed.

I’ve spent the majority of my time so far, cooped up in my room reading, aside from the movie night with Giovanni in the theater room. He said I have free reign of the place but also said it’s best I don’t spend time in the common room since that’s where most of the members and escorts hang out. I plan to explore the outdoors soon, but I’ve been waiting for my ribs to heal all the way.

It’s now Saturday, which means I’m going to see my best friend Amber today. I’ve spent the last nine months with my life on hold, so it’ll be nice to see my friend and hopefully feel some sense of normalcy again.

“Good morning.” Giovanni rolls over onto his back, yawning and stretching. I watch as he runs his fingers through his messy hair. His shirt rises and shows a bit of his happy trail. After everything that’s happened to me, I shouldn’t even want to look at another man again, and trust me, I have no intention of having sex any time soon, but I’d be blind not to notice how sexy Giovanni is. I’m a female with hormones, and while it makes me sick to think about what happened to me, I know sex can be enjoyable. I know what happened to me wasn’t my fault. Plus, the therapist Giovanni made me see last week confirmed that.

I’ve agreed to keep seeing her once a week to talk to her. Her name is Dr. Weisberg and she’s a really sweet woman in her fifties. She, just like Giovanni, said she thinks it’s amazing how strong I am, but also said sometimes rape victims feel numb at first, and once it really hits them what’s happened, they need a soft cushion to land on. She would like to be my cushion, and I agreed to let her.

I look at the man lying next to me and think of all the different personality hats he wears: serious, cold, and calculating when he’s working, but then gentle, sweet, nurturing, and funny when it’s just us. Unfortunately, it seems his life revolves around the former more often than the latter.

“Morning, Gio.”

“Gio?” He smirks at me, his eyes still half-lidded from just waking up.

“Yeah, I’ve decided to call you Gio. Giovanni sounds too stuffy and serious, and I’ve seen you catch popcorn and jellybeans in your mouth. I know your whole ‘I’m the boss’ is just a front for the softy you really are.”

Gio rolls to his side with his hand propping his head up. “I’m a businessman. I’m supposed to be stuffy and serious.” He grabs my shirt and pulls me closer to him playfully. “And don’t use the food catching against me. You made me do it.”

I ignore the feeling stirring in my belly at our sudden closeness. “Umm...yeah…after you made fun of me for crying during Romeo and Juliet. Plus, I like Gio better. You aren’t stuffy…serious, maybe, but only when someone doesn’t do as you say then you go all cold and mean. Like I said, it’s a front.” I shrug and get up to use the bathroom—needing some space.

“It’s not a front. I’m a serious fucking guy, woman!” he calls out after me with laughter in his voice.

“Uh huh! Whatever you say! Want to watch another episode of The Vampire Diaries?”

“Don’t tease me! I’m still pissed you insisted we wait to start season two! I need to know if Jeremy turns into a vampire.”

“You’ll have to wait until tonight! Now let me get ready. We need to leave soon.”

Three nights ago, after staying up late and watching several romantic comedies despite Gio’s whining, I had enough of him sleeping on the couch. I offered to sleep in another room but he wasn’t having it, so I told him the only way I would sleep in his room was if he agreed to sleep in the bed with me. His jaw almost hit the floor.

“Will you just come lie down and watch TV?” I pat the bed next to me. Gio’s bed is huge, like if there’s a size bigger than a California king, that’s the size of his bed.