Dear Heart, I Hate You

“Of course. And, Jules?”

“Yeah?”

“I miss you.”

“Miss you too.”

Raising his voice to catch my attention before I hung up, he called out, “And hey!”

“Yes?”

“Send me a picture of you and Tami right now.”

“Oh my gosh. Done!”

“’Bye, babe.”

“’Bye.”

As I pressed End, Tami raised her eyebrows at me. “Oh man. I can’t wait to meet him in real life.”

“You’re going to love him. He wants a picture of us, by the way,” I said as I held my phone up high, fitting us both into the frame and making sure we looked good.

“I’d want a picture of us too,” she said, smiling as she held her wineglass in the air.

Making sure the picture was hot enough to send, I fired off a text to Cal with the picture included.

Less than a minute later, he sent one back. When I held the phone toward Tami, she laughed at the picture of him mimicking her pose, holding a beer in the air and wearing a kissy face.

“Holy lips,” Tami said as she pulled the phone out of my hand.

Shaking my head, I said, “You have no idea.” I tossed back the rest of my wine and pushed off my chair. “Want more?”

Tami stood up as well. “We need food.”

“Agreed,” I said, rubbing my stomach as we headed inside.

I whipped us up some whole wheat pasta with olive oil, which was way more fattening than one would think, but oh so delicious. My excuse was that it went well with the wine. Tami tried to complain about the calories, but when I reminded her that she never gained weight, she quickly shut up and finished off her plate.

We picked out a romantic comedy to watch after dinner, and when Tami fell asleep on the couch all bundled up, I left her there and headed into my bedroom for some Cal-filled slumber. Dream Cal was extra hot, and so were his lips.

God, I couldn’t wait to see him.

Whole Damn Zoo

Jules

Eight days. The next handful of days flew by much quicker than I ever thought possible. Cal and I had a phone conversation every evening, no matter how brief, discussing things from our favorite foods to places we wanted to travel.

Throughout the day, we texted, those texts growing more frequent as his trip neared. They usually were just quick messages like “I miss you” or “thinking of you,” but that didn’t make them any less sweet. Maybe it made them even more so. Knowing that I was in his thoughts as often as he was in mine was reassuring.

I was thankful that my job was a constant state of busy. I could schedule appointments as late into the evening as my clients would allow. Working during the weekends was usually a no-brainer since most people preferred looking at as many properties as possible, and their work schedules during the week made their free time limited. On Saturdays and Sundays, I was usually slammed all day long, but I was thankful for it. It helped settle my heart and keep my mind focused and on task.

Once I got home, however, it was a whole other story. My entire being tuned to Cal Donovan and how many days I had left until he would be here. There were eight, by the way, a number I couldn’t forget since I still woke up each morning to a countdown text. When we reached single digits, I almost cried, not out of anything other than being genuinely filled with happiness. It was ridiculous, but I loved it and refused to fight it.

The feelings I had for him were both unexpected and unfamiliar, and their intensity took my breath away. Cal had been an exception to everything I’d ever thought I wanted, and I couldn’t pretend that he wasn’t. It wasn’t in my nature to lie—not to others, and especially not to myself.

So when he called each night, I found it more difficult than usual to keep those thoughts and feelings inside instead of letting them fly out of my mouth. Cal was focused on work, and even though he was the one who had initiated his trip out here to see me, I didn’t want to scare him off with my intensity.