Forever Changed

Pulling my thoughts back out of the gutter, I looked back at her and saw her studying me.

“Damn those promises I’ve made, huh?” she said, reading my mind.

I spent the drive to the airport rehashing my morning outing with Maddon. The canoe ride was more fun than I would have ever thought, and I

was disappointed when we had to head back. I definitely wouldn’t mind going to Blue Springs again sometime.

“Don’t worry, we’ll come back next month,” Maddon promised.

I didn’t argue with him, but I felt we were on borrowed time, waiting for the other shoe to drop. I tried hard to believe that if Lacey’s mom did run her mouth, the situation would work itself out and we could still see each other, but the more I thought about it, the more doubt crept in.

I was playing with fire and I knew it, but the connection I felt with him made it impossible for me to walk away. Watching him doing something as heroic as saving a little girl, then to something as mundane as rowing a canoe had made me entertain thoughts about him that would make an old lady blush. I knew by the way he watched me in the canoe that his feelings matched mine, and I couldn’t help the rush of pleasure that raced through me thinking about it. I still planned on keeping my promise to my dad, but I found nothing wrong with at least fantasizing about it.

Parking at Orlando International Airport was a pain, so I had talked Mom into telling my grandma and Donna that I would leave thirty minutes later and meet them in the pickup lane in front of baggage claim. My grandma had bitterly complained about waiting on the curb like some street urchin, but Mom had stood her ground and suggested kindly that perhaps a rental car would be easier. Grandma grudgingly caved and was waiting by the curb when I pulled up to get them. I had to bite off a laugh at how out of place she looked waiting at the curb.

“Hey Grandma,” I said, hopping out of the car to give her a hug. She returned it stiffly. She and my aunt Donna had never been overly affectionate, which was ironic since my father was famous for the bear hugs he used to divvy out. It was hard to believe they were all three blood-related.

“Hi, Aunt Donna,” I said, giving her a hug too.

“Kassandra,” she said, responding with a hug slightly warmer than Grandma’s.

I opened the hatch of my Explorer and helped stow their luggage away.

“How was your flight?” I asked, buckling my seatbelt before pulling away from the pickup lane.

“It was fine, though the young lady across from us really didn’t belong in first class,” Grandma said in her normal judgmental way.

“Mom, I told you she paid the same price for her seat as we did,” Donna said, shooting me a look.

I held back a smile.

The rest of the ride was a mixture of complaints and criticism as Grandma drilled me about everything, from school to cheerleading. She had never been a fan of me wasting my time “tumbling through the air,” as she put it, but the fact that I had quit mid season irked her more.

“Quitters never prosper,” she admonished.

“I know Grandma. I remember you telling Dad that when he dropped out of the race for mayor.”

“I loved your father, but he never lived up to his potential,” she sniffed.

“Grandma, that’s not true. Daddy had a successful business and always took good care of us,” I said quietly.

“Kassandra—impertinence,” she chastised me. She had been using the phrase on us for years if our opinion ever differed from hers.

I held my tongue and drove the rest of the way home in silence while Donna and Grandma continued to bicker back and forth. It was going to be a long three days.

***

My words proved to be truer than any I had ever expected. From the moment Grandma walked through the front door, until the moment Mom drove her and Donna back to the airport three days later, she didn’t stop complaining and criticizing. She had issues with the fact that Mom wasn’t taking a more active role in Dad’s business, she was upset our house wasn’t decked out in lights like it normally was, but most of all, she was appalled that Megan was still “mute,” as she put it.

“Why in heaven’s name wouldn’t you do something about it is what I want to know,” she squabbled.

Mom was patient and waited until Megan was out of earshot to explain that they were both involved in counseling. I loved Grandma, but she was driving me nuts, to the point where I had to walk away so I wouldn’t revert back to my previous snippy ways and put her in her place.

The only good thing that came out of the visit was that the constant criticism kept us from focusing on the holiday, and before we knew it, our first Christmas without my dad was behind us. Surprisingly, the only one who shed a tear that day was Grandma. Mom was so over her that I caught her muttering to herself several times that she was going to remove the Christmas ham from the oven and replace it with Grandma’s head. Megan and I smiled when we heard her mumbling in the kitchen, before escaping to my room for some Grandma-free time. The only thing that saved me the three days they were here was my endless texting with Maddon. Through text messaging, I learned more about Maddon than anyone else I had ever known. We shared our dreams, fears, past drama, and everything in between. The break from each other was hard, but the texting allowed me the freedom to express feelings and hurts I would have otherwise been too embarrassed to admit in person.

“It’s hard to believe Dad came from that,” I said to my mom when she arrived home from the airport, looking harassed. She didn’t answer me right away, but instead headed for the kitchen. We watched as she pulled out the bottle of wine she had bought for their visit and the leftover chocolate cream pie. Megan and I laughed as she poured herself a tall glass of wine and dug into the pie without bothering to cut off a slice.

“Stress much?” I asked, grabbing a fork for Megan and me.