Best Friend's Ex Box Set
"It's complicated," I said trying to think of a way to explain the situation to her, but the more I thought about it the worse it all sounded. How could I explain my estrangement from my parents to a kid who'd just lost her parents?
"You didn't get along with them," she said.
"Yeah, something like that," I nodded as I wiped the phone off and tucked it in my pants pocket.
"Did they do something mean to you?" she asked. "I used to get really angry at my parents when they'd punish me for something I didn't think was wrong, so I know that feeling."
"It's more complicated than that," I admitted. Honor stared up at me awaiting a real answer, and when I didn't immediately provide one, she sighed heavily and walked toward the front porch.
"You know," she said turning around and shielding her eyes with her hand. "Everyone thinks I'm too young to understand things, but I do understand them. I understand them a lot better than anyone thinks."
"Look, Honor, I'm not trying to avoid your question," I said as I followed her to the porch and sat down on the step next to her. "It's just that I don't know how to explain what happened in my family, and I don't like the way it makes me feel."
"Kind of like how I feel about Mamm and Dat dying?" she asked with a sad, but hopeful look on her face. I debated what to say next and then finally decided that being honest was my best bet.
"I know you're not stupid, but there's stuff about my family that even I don't understand," I said as I tried to explain. "My parents want me to do what they want me to do, not what I want to do. They're angry at me because I'm taking a different path than they planned and it doesn't match the one that they'd already made for me. I think they're partly mad at me, and partly mad at themselves."
"Yeah, I know what you mean," she nodded as she bent forward and brushed some dirt off her foot. "Mamm and Dat wanted me to stay here and be part of the community, but I told them I wanted out. I want to do what Grace did. I don't want to live here my whole life and never see anything or go anywhere."
She looked up at me and when I simply nodded, she continued speaking, "It was hard to convince them that I should be allowed to make my own choices, you know? As Amish, we're taught to do everything for the good of the community, not for ourselves, but I told them that if I was forced to stay and I ended up miserable, that wouldn't help the community, would it?"
"That's a very logical argument," I chuckled. "Maybe I need to take you with me when I go see my parents."
"Maybe you do," Honor said seriously. "English, Grace loves you. I can tell."
"Wait, what?" I said trying not to sound too surprised. "How can you say that, we've only known each other a short time? You can't fall in love with someone you just met."
"Wanna bet?" Honor said. "Verity did it. And Hope and Faith did, too. And Mamm once told me that she fell in love with Dat the day she met him, but that they couldn't get married in second grade, so she waited."
"That's insane," I laughed out loud, making Honor frown. "Sorry, I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at the idea that you can fall in love with a complete stranger. Mamm and sisters all knew the men they married as kids, Grace and I only met a few weeks ago, and we're grownups."
"You English are really stupid, you know that?" she said rolling her eyes as she hopped up off the step and stood with her hands on her hips looking down at me. "I'm telling you that Grace loves you because I've known her my whole life, and if you ask Verity or Danny what they think, they'll tell you the exact same thing. Grace loves you, English."
"Well I'll be damned," I muttered as I looked away.
"Just saying," Honor shrugged. She stared at me for a few seconds and when I didn't say anything more, she turned and ran back toward the barn and left me sitting on the steps trying to figure out what to do with the bomb she'd just dropped.
#
I'd just entered the house when my phone rang again, I hesitated to pull it out of my pocket, fearing that my mother would be calling to make additional demands. When the ringing stopped and then started again, I yanked the phone out ready to go on the attack only to find Grace on the other end of the line.
"Grace," I said. "How was your meeting?"
"It went well; I got a promotion," she said. I could feel her excitement through the phone and I smiled.
"That's fantastic, congratulations!" I said as I pictured her standing in an office somewhere in the Loop, modern and in control. "We're going to have to celebrate when you come back down."
"Or when you come back to the city," she said dropping her voice to a low murmur. "I miss you, Adam."
"I miss you, too," I heard myself saying. "But you'll be back on Monday and we'll get things all straightened out."
I knew exactly why I was holding back the fact that I'd be in Chicago the next night, but the part of me that had actually listened to what Honor had said wavered.
"Yeah, I'm going to go to some business thing tomorrow night to meet with the folks who are going to be on the merger team," she sighed. "I don't want to do a business dinner on the weekend, but Mike thinks it's important now that he's promoted me to department leader."
"Then it's good for you to go," I urged. "We'll hold down the fort until you get back. I promise."
Lying, even if it