Fake Marriage Box Set

I grabbed my wallet and stared at the guy, making him feel awkward since he had no idea what was going on when he pounded on the door. I tipped him extra just because I knew I was being a prick, and grabbed the pie, taking it into the kitchen and grabbing some plates. I pulled down some paper towels and glasses for water before stopping at the breakfast bar and looking down into the living room. Quinn was sitting there on the couch, her fingers gently grazing her swollen lips, and her eyes fixated on an imaginary point. I could tell she was thinking and thinking hard, and it tore me instantly to pieces thinking I had done something to cause her to withdraw. She had just started to come out of her shell, something that I really wanted for her and for me, and I had gone and ruined it.

Instantly, I regretted what I had done. I didn’t regret the kiss itself, which was mind-blowing and on another level from any kiss I’d had before, but I regretted the line that I had crossed. It hadn’t even been one night, and we had already kissed, forcing ourselves over boundaries that I was sure both of us had drawn before she had ever made her way over to my house. I was at a complete loss for words, never having been in a situation like that before, and not wanting to say something that would send her spiraling away from me. My best bet was to be quiet for that moment, letting the events that had happened really sink into both of our brains. I took the plates and glasses over to the kitchen table that sat caddy corner to the open kitchen and set them down, still staring over at Quinn and wondering whether I should approach the subject or leave it raw until tomorrow.

“Are you hungry?”

“Sure,” she said, sounding slightly dazed.

She walked up the stairs that led down into the recessed living room and over to the table, pulling out a chair and sitting down. She still wore the same far off stare that she had in the living room, only now she was moving at least, going through the motions of eating with me. I wished that I knew what was going on in her head, so I could understand exactly what she was feeling, but I couldn’t. All I had to go on were my own thoughts, and those weren’t still stuck in the passion of it all. I took a deep breath and put down my slice of pizza, looking over at Quinn.

“I’m sorry,” I said, launching into a full-scale apology. “I should never have done that. You have been so wonderful to me and Jake, and I had drawn a hard line in the sand before you ever got here. I should be treating this like what I described to you that night in the diner, not going off on a limb and wrangling you into a passionate kiss. This was supposed to be a platonic fake en

gagement, and I need to be treating it as such. I shouldn’t have kissed you, I know that now, and I hope that it didn’t affect you too deeply. It was amazing, but the repercussions for my selfishness and lack of self-control could really affect you, and I don’t want that, like I told you before. I promise you that I won’t allow it to happen again.”

I watched her as she slowly nodded her head up and down, looking completely shell-shocked by the events that had just taken place. I wanted her to talk to me, to tell me what she was thinking, but the last thing I wanted to do was push her too far. All I could do at that point was pray that I hadn’t completely screwed up things beyond repair. I had to hope that, even though I felt the passion between us, that she could forgive me, move forward, and we could forget it ever happened. Of course, that was probably just a pipe dream and whatever damage that had been done was already complete. I had to remind myself that my feelings and needs no longer mattered and that all of this was for Jake.

The last thing I needed was to end up hurting Quinn and having her flee, going back home and attempting to forget that I ever pressed my lips against hers. Everything had moved so fast, and I think that between the excitement of looking forward to the weekend with Jake, coupled with how beautiful she was and how attracted I was to her, I let myself get carried away with someone who should have been treated with the utmost respect and thoughtfulness. Never again, no matter how much wine I had to drink. I had to remember exactly why we were here together, and not put everything in jeopardy over my desires.

We sat quietly at the dinner table, slowly eating our pizza and avoiding conversation or even eye contact for that matter. The house was so silent, and I wanted to put on some music or flip on the television to drown out the thick, uncomfortable feeling that was pulsing between us. Every time I had something good in my life, I managed to screw it up somehow, and I was starting to fear that this was the exact case with Quinn, as it had been for so many other things. When Quinn was done eating, she wiped her mouth with her napkin and took in a deep breath, still staring off into the distance. I sat there watching her, waiting for her to make the next move.

“You know what? It has been an incredibly long, arduous, and surprising day,” she said calmly, finally shifting her eyes up toward mine. “I am exhausted, and I think that I am going to skip any more wine or food and head straight to bed. I need some sleep, so I can feel clear minded and level headed in the morning.”

“Whatever you need,” I said, with a small smile.

“Goodnight,” she said, standing up and putting her plate in the sink before walking down the hallway and shutting the bedroom door behind her.

I sat there at the table for another couple minutes, my mind ricocheting between the shame I had just brought upon myself and the way that her lips had felt pressed against mine. Finally, I took a deep breath and stood up, grabbing the pizza and tossing it in the fridge. I stood over the sink rinsing the plates and putting them in the dishwasher, my mind somewhere far away from the hot water running in my sink.

When I was done cleaning up, I grabbed a beer from the fridge and plopped down on the couch, putting my feet up on the coffee table and leaning back. I sat there beating myself up for allowing things to progress the way they had. I should have held back from kissing her; I should have forced myself to stop doing everything without thought first. At the same time though, that kiss was more than a kiss, and even she couldn’t deny that. There was an emotion behind it that was unfamiliar but strong. I wanted her, but in a way that I hadn’t wanted any other woman in my entire life. The feeling of her lips, the taste of her mouth, and the vibration of her moans echoed through my body, and I fought my lust and emotion with my brain, determined to win this battle.

I had made a mistake, something that couldn’t be taken back, and I had to move forward with it. Quinn was absolutely stunning, kind, and amazing, but there was nothing I could do at that point. Maybe it was for the better, especially since one day this would end, and I would be left saying goodbye to Quinn, and she would be walking out of my life.

Chapter Twenty

Quinn

I was so used to being up at the butt crack of dawn that my internal alarm went off before I could even think about it. I looked out the window from my bed and realized that it was just then dawn, and I groaned, wishing I could go back to sleep. However, having done this so many times, and being disoriented from waking up in a strange place, my body gave me no choice but to get up and get moving. I pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, figuring since I didn’t have to work, there was no reason to jump right into the shower. Besides, Luke had a job to get to, so I figured I would let him take advantage of the hot water first before I got in there. I could shower after he was already gone to work. It felt really strange not having anywhere to go, but at the same time, not feeling at home in my surroundings.

Feeling uneasy, I set off to do the best thing I knew to do to make myself feel more at home here—get to work cooking. There was nothing more comforting than the smell of good food cooking in the kitchen. It always made me feel at home, no matter where I was. I opened the door and walked softly through the house, unsure of what time Luke actually had to get up. Immediately I pulled out food and began to cook, humming to myself as I sipped at my hot coffee and took in a deep breath of the smell of bacon on the griddle.

Only about five minutes after the bacon hit the pan and began to sizzle, Luke came almost stumbling out of the den, holding his back and limping like an old man. I poured him a cup of coffee and handed it over, giving him a look of pity. He sat down at the breakfast bar and stretched his back, groaning loudly.

“Apparently the pull-out in the den isn’t quite as comfortable as I remembered,” he said with a chuckle. “The last time I slept on it I was wasted though, so that is probably why I remembered it as more comfortable than it apparently was.”

“Aw,” I said, laughing. “I’m so sorry. If it makes you feel any better, I slept like a damn baby.”

“No, that does not make me feel better,” he said, laughing. “You are rubbing it in.”

“That’s how I roll,” I said with a smile, turning back to the pancakes and flipping them over in the pan. “Well, hopefully a nice hot breakfast will make you feel a little better. If nothing else, you’ll be full as you’re limping off to work.”

I grabbed some plates out of the cabinet and put them down on the counter, divvying up the bacon, eggs, and pancakes. I set his plate down in front of him and watched as his eyes glazed over, his tongue moving across his lips. I laughed quietly and grabbed the syrup and butter from the fridge and put it next to his plate.

“This is getting better and better by every minute,” he said, excited about the freshly cooked breakfast. “You are going to make me fat, but at this moment, I am really okay with that.”

“Maybe fat will suit you,” I said, laughing.

I was trying really hard not to be awkward, which was like trying really hard not to be me, but be a rainbow-striped giraffe instead. But I wanted to start my day out in a positive way, so I struck up whatever conversation that came to mind. Even if I was being awkward, Luke wouldn’t have noticed since he was too busy shoveling food into his mouth, making me feel useful and good about my cooking talents.

“So, what is your day like today?”