Addicted

Keno might have been becoming my friend. I felt like Abby was my friend, in a lot of ways. She cared about me. She went out of her way to do stuff for me. She didn't let me keep hurting myself when I wanted her, too. I didn't want to be her friend, though. Not just her friend. Keno could be my friend. I wanted her to be more than that. How much more? It wasn't worth asking since she wanted nothing to do with me now.

I came to the bar more often now, but not to drink in the morning like a crazy person. It was pretty early, but there were still some people lounging around the pool when I passed by it to get to the bar. I said hey to Keno, seeing him in his usual spot. He asked me what I had going on today. Nothing, as usual.

“I was going to head out to the beach. The waves look good today,” he said.

“You want to swim?”

“Surf,” he said. “You’re coming with me.”

“I don’t know how to surf,” I said.

“You’re still coming with me,” he announced, coming around the bar.

“You mean right now?”

“No time like the present,” he said.

“Can you just leave? Aren’t you working?”

“Hawai’i is the freest state in the US; you can do whatever you want here,” he said, laughing.

Shit. Okay, if he said so. I was down. I hadn’t spent much time at the resort’s beach, but I looked at it from my suite every day. I had seen people surfing. I had never done it a day in my life, but why not? Keno was cool.

After giving me a Surf 101 lesson on the beach on our rented boards, we went out on the water. It was a lot harder than he made it look. I watched him more than actually managing to do it myself, but it wasn’t a bad way to spend a morning. He sat on his board and paddled over to me.

“I don’t know if this is my sport, man,” I said.

“You should learn. Girls love it,” he said, laughing. Since he had brought up girls…

"I talked to Abby the other day," I told him.

"That's great. How'd it go?"

"Not good," I admitted.

"She refused to talk to you?"

"No, it wasn't that. I went to talk to her at her desk. I asked her to go out with me. She gave this bum excuse about not being able to see guests personally. That isn't true, is it?"

"Whether it's true or not, that was a really convenient time for her to bring it up," Keno remarked.

"I fucked up. I want to see her, and she won't even give me the time of day."

"You miss her."

"I just want to see her again. It wasn't fair, what I did to her. And it didn't even do anything. I still feel like shit."

"I don't know what you're waiting for, brother," Keno said.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you don't have to do this to yourself."

"I already tried to talk to her. I have to try something else. I don't know. I'll think of something."

"How long will that take?" he asked. "You said it yourself: you’re leaving, she’s staying here. You only have so many days till you have to get on that plane."

"You want me to go to her house and refuse to leave until she agrees to talk to me?" I asked, getting frustrated.