Plum Lovin' (Stephanie Plum 12.50)

“Good to know,” Morelli said. “I should have this wrapped up Tuesday or Wednesday. See you then.” And he disconnected.

I cut down to Klockner Roulevard and then to Hamilton and left-turned into the Burg. I eased to a stop in front of my parents' house and killed the engine. Grandma was at the storm door, looking out at me, driven there by some mysterious inner radar that tells her when a granddaughter is approaching. Not that different from Diesel, when you think about it.

“Just in time,” Grandma said to me, holding the door open. “Your sister is here, and we got a nice coffee cake from the bakery.”

Bob heard my voice and came thundering down the hall, ears flopping, tongue out, google-eyed. He slid on the polished wood floor and plowed into me, knocking me into the wall.

I scratched his head and gave him a hug, and he galloped back to the kitchen and the coffee cake.

“He's been such a good boy,” Grandma said. “It makes a house feel like a home when you got a dog in it. And he didn't hardly eat anything this time. The TV Guide and a loaf of bread, but the good thing was he horked up the plastic wrap.”

Valerie was at the little kitchen table. She had the baby on her lap and coffee in front of her.

“Where are the girls?” I asked.

“Playgroup,” Valerie said. “They go every day now.”

I sliced off a chunk of coffee cake and out of habit I stood at the sink to eat.

My mother put a plate and fork and napkin on the table. “Sit,” she said. “It's not good for your digestion to eat at the sink. You eat too fast. You don't even chew. Did you chew that piece of cake?”

I didn't know if I'd chewed it. I couldn't even remember eating it, but my hand was empty, and I had crumbs on my shirt, so I guess that said it all.

I pulled a chair out across from Valerie and sat down. It was too late to eat my cake in a civilized manner… unless I had a second piece. I checked out the waistband on my jeans. Snug. Shit.

“Sorry I made Albert faint at the table,” I said to Valerie. “I thought he was sort of over the marriage phobia.”

“It's hideous,” Valerie said. “The man is never going to marry me. I didn't mind at first. I thought he just needed time. Now I don't know what he needs.”

“He needs his head examined,” Grandma said.

“He had it examined,” Valerie said. “They didn't find anything.”

We all pondered that for a moment.

“Anyway, it's important that we get married,” Valerie said. “I'm pregnant again.”

We were all dumbfounded.

“Is that good news?” Grandma asked.

“Yes. I want to have another baby with Albert,” Valerie said. “I just wish I was married.”

Okay, that was the deal-breaker. Albert Kloughn was going down. He was going to marry my sister. I was going to make it happen.

I scraped my chair back. “Gotta go. Things to do. People to see. Is it okay if I leave Bob here just a little longer?”

“He's not here forever, is he?” my mother asked.

“No! I'll be back for him. I promise.”

I hurried out of the kitchen and drove the short distance to Jeanine's house. Her date was due to arrive any minute, and I thought it wouldn't hurt to do a last-minute courage check. I parked in front of her house, ran to the door, and rang the bell.

The door was thrown open, and Jeanine stood there buck naked. “Ta daaaah!” she sang out.

We locked eyes, and we both let out a shriek. I clapped my hands over my eyes, and Jeanine slammed the door shut. A minute later, the door reopened and Jeanine appeared, wrapped in a blanket.

“I thought you were Edward,” she said.