Release (Off Balance 3)

"I need the money. There's a whole story you don't know about, and I'm not about to go into detail right now." His face hardened, telling me not to push him on the matter. "There was a time when Holly and I had to live with Kova and Katja. They took care of us until my parents and Kova could come to an agreement. We needed money and gymnastics doesn't allow for a part-time job, so I decided to do what I could and started selling my prescriptions."

My brows shot to my hairline. What else in the ever-loving hell went on inside the walls of World Cup that I didn't know about? Hayden and Holly lived with Kova? That was a huge bomb to drop with no time to process it, let alone ask questions.

"I'm not a bad guy," Hayden said, quietly shutting the door and turning the lock I never even knew was there.

"I never took you for a bad guy."

Hayden pushed me up against a wall and his gaze lowered. I left everything outside the locker room in that moment and closed my thoughts off. I had to if I was going to do this. Pressing his body to mine, he said, "I'm not hurting anyone. We need money to live, and this helps out. Did I answer enough questions?"

"I don’t agree with what you're doing, but I get it. I’d just rather not know about it."

"Deal," he said, then slanted his mouth over mine.

"Hayden," I whispered, breaking the kiss. "What if we get caught?"

"Don't worry. We won't. No one will know."

For a split second I got the feeling he'd done this before, but I dropped it because I didn’t want to fight with him again.

Oddly enough, he was prepared, condoms and all. It didn't take us long, maybe five minutes tops from start to finish. I had Hayden take me from behind so he didn't have to see the anguish split across my face. He didn't argue and told me it was his favorite position anyway. It was the definition of a quickie, and it was my first.

I faked it—another first for me. I could've won an award for my acting. As much as I wanted to have an orgasm—I could definitely use it—I knew I wouldn't be able to come once we walked in this room, no matter how much I wanted to. Not with Kova across the hall. I couldn't focus while he was deep inside his wife, even though Hayden was inside of me.

"We should try to sneak in here more often," Hayden said, and I just nodded. I hadn't even been wet and he didn't notice.

We went our separate ways and I chalked up, feeling more tense than relieved and I wanted to scream. I didn't know what I was thinking, but I should've never agreed to go with Hayden. I'd yet to have an orgasm the way I did with Kova and it was starting to bother me. I could hardly get myself off the way he did, so I wasn't sure why this time would be any different.

Fixing my leotard, I climbed onto the tall blocking mats and gripped the high bar. I felt the pull in my shoulders and sighed, feeling good. I inched my way across, chalk dust sprinkled down my face, then I did a pullover so my thighs were resting on the bar.

Rebounding off with my hips, I swung down and performed giant after giant first. I needed that free-floating speed to feel like I was flying so fast that everything I was holding inside was banished from within me. Gymnastics was all about having the courage to hang on but the strength to let go. I wish I knew how to apply that to my personal life.

When I was alone and in my head, it only took me seconds to break down and weaken emotionally when I needed to be brave and strong. Swinging on the high bar gave me just that, and it was why I tried to spend as much time at World Cup as I could. An adrenaline high was rushing through me, making me stronger and bolder…and I loved this feeling. It was one I chased and inhaled into my lungs.

Letting go, I did a flyaway into the pit. I climbed out and got back up, this time getting right to business and completed a double layout. I lost count of the amount of practice dismounts I completed—a blessing, since the last thing I wanted was to keep track of how long Kova was having sex with Katja.

"Now, when you are on the second layout, you are going to clap."

Surprised, I looked up from the foam pit. The devil himself stood with his hands on his hips glaring down at me. My stomach was in knots and I could barely look at him.

"Look who decided to grace me with his presence," I deadpanned.

Kova continued to glare. "On the second layout—"

"Oh, we're going there. Got it." I couldn't believe he was going to act like nothing had happened. I had planned to do that since I was just as guilty for eavesdropping, and more, but the way he walked up and acted like he had done nothing more than grab a drink of water seriously got me revved up.

"Adrianna."

"What?" I snapped. Kova reached down with an opened hand, but I didn't take it. I hid my disgust with both him and myself and got out on my own. I stood in front of him and fixed my leotard. The foam pit always gave me a wedgie.

"On the second—"

"I heard you the first time." I cut him off again. "What do you mean, clap? Like an actual clap?" I'd never heard of that before. I literally pictured a clap.

"Yes, like an actual clap," he said. "When you are flipping, it is sometimes hard to get your hands together because of inertia, but it is a good drill to get your timing right so you know when to start twisting. Once you are in rotation, your body will want to keep going that way. It will take an external force for you to change the direction of that motion, and clapping at your center"—he looked at my torso and pointed to near my belly button—"say right there, will help you with that."

"Huh." You learn something new every day. "Did you learn this in Russia with your lunatic coaches?"

He lowered his eyes, unimpressed. "No, at the Olympic Training Center."