It felt like she sat there for hours, broken porcelain badly glued together. She could either fall deeper inside herself to escape the thought of Lucien with Rose, or she could fall deeper into a problem she might be able to fix. Laila’s image wavered in her mind. She went to Lucien to confide in him, finally, to ask him to help her get Laila out, to tell him that after they helped the MacLachlans, she was leaving the Center, that she was no longer fighting for Marita. The beginnings of a plan were forming in her mind—it wasn’t much, but so far it was all she had. It was all Laila had. It was all the next generation had if she was going to be able to enforce the beginning of the end of a millennia-old racial war.
“Caia?”
She bolted upright at the sound of Mordecai on the other side of her door, and jumped off the bed, flicking her wrist to replace the lamp she’d broken, wiping her hand across her face to glamour away any evidence of her crying.
“Mordecai,” she greeted brightly and gestured for him to come into the room. He regarded her with an odd smile as he took a seat.
“Are you all right?”
“Of course.”
“Marita said you visited the Midnight.”
Caia’s smile tightened. “Yeah. I was curious.”
He grinned back at her. “I wondered what happened in the lecture hall. I keep forgetting you’re the true Head of the Midnights.”
“I’ve been hearing that a lot.”
“I just came up to fill you in on training today.”
Caia nodded and listened patiently as he explained the strategies that had been used in the woodland simulator.
“I’ve never worked with Anders before, but he’s an extremely good leader.” Mordecai laughed as if remembering something. “Of course, he and Marion have been placed in charge of the task force, but Phoebe has other ideas. I don’t think she and Anders like each other very much.”
“Sounds like I missed some drama.”
He nodded and then grew quiet.
Eventually … “Caia?”
She frowned. This was the first time the self-assured magik looked uncomfortable and unsure. “Yeah?”
“The simulator … well … after your run in it the other night, there was some energy picked up around a certain oak?”
She flushed. Oh dear. How to explain that one?
“I, uh …”
“Was it you?”
There was nothing to do but be honest. And she knew she could trust Mordecai.
“Yes. I’m so sorry. I just … got angry. And killed it. I replaced it, though.” She threw him an imploring smile.
Mordecai grinned back at her. “Yes, you did.”
Caia watched as he took off his glasses to rub a smudge from the lens. “Was it deliberate?”
“No.”
“Cy, I know what you did to Ethan.”
“Do you, ’cause I don’t,” she quipped, but he only smiled like he pitied her.
“The tree? Was it an unfortunate victim of your anger over Rose and Lucien?”
This was even worse than she thought.
“Maybe,” she managed through clenched teeth.
“Does that happen a lot, when you get angry? Can you not control it?”
How to explain something this weird?
“It just happened with Ethan and the tree. And once with a female from my pack. It’s a white heat that just explodes out of me. But I think I’m beginning to control it. With Alexa, the girl from my pack, I blew her across the room—I would never hurt a member of my pack intentionally. With Ethan … he was going to kill Lucien, and I knew he was evil, so I guess it made whatever it is stronger. Marion thinks it’s something to do with my water element. The tree … my focus was on it when I let myself get mad enough about the Rose situation.”
He nodded. “You don’t think it’s a problem?”
“No. I was going to talk to you about it, but I think I’m getting a handle on it now.”
He appeared uncertain, as if he had more questions. Instead he settled back to ask why she’d blown Alexa across the room. Soon she was telling him all about the pack.
“They sound great.” He grinned. “I wish I could meet them.”
“Maybe you will.”
“Jaeden sounds like a riot.”
Melancholy swept over Caia. She wondered how Jaeden was, if Ryder had managed to get her back to the pack safely.
“She was.”
“Don’t you mean is? She sounds tough, Caia. She’ll be all right.”
“I hope so. What she went through was unbelievable.”
Mordecai’s expression twisted in sympathy. “What did he actually do to her?”
She shook her head. That was nobody’s business but Jaeden’s, and no matter how much she liked Mordecai, she wasn’t going to give him the sordid details.
“I’d rather not talk about it.”
He snapped back in his seat, looking abashed. “Oh, of course. I didn’t mean to pry.”
“I know.” She smiled kindly.
He stood. “You look exhausted. I’m going to leave and let you get some sleep so that you’re prepared for the training tomorrow.”