An Innocent Obsession

“I wanted to go to school and become the kind of woman who could h-have you. But I needed money to do that and I…” I press my hands to my flaming cheeks. “I needed to be near you. In any way I could. It was like…if I didn’t get close to you somehow, my heart was going to burst.” My head drops forward because I don’t want to see his reactions to the rest. I can’t witness his disgust. “Karen told me one day that her friend cleans houses for a living and it gave me an idea. I waited outside your building and found out the company you use when they arrived to clean. I l-lied about my age on the application. I told them I worked at the orphanage, not that I lived here. I made some fake references and…they’d just lost some staff and were desperate, so they hired me. I couldn’t believe it. I was cleaning your house.” My voice drops to a whisper. “And touching your things. And lying in your bed and a lot of other things that I’m ashamed of.”

Still I don’t look up, terrified of what I’ll see.

“After a while, it wasn’t enough. I know it sounds crazy, but I…thought you were waiting for me. You were never pictured with dates anymore and I just wanted that to be true so bad.” I sniff and wipe at my eyes. “And I know it’s impossible when you’d never even met me. I know that, but my heart wouldn’t rest. It wouldn’t let me stay away. I stalked you.”

“Emery.”

“And now I know the real you and…you’re even more incredible than I could have imagined. You’re real. You’re a man with frustrations and hopes…and you mean even more to me now because of it.” I crush my threadbare quilt between my fingers. “I’m so sorry. If you’re going to have me arrested, please don’t get Karen in trouble. She told me I needed to stop so many times—”

“Have you arrested?” Clarke ducks down into my line of vision, tilting up my chin with a finger so I can see the incredulity on his face. “I came here to take you home, angel, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” He points at the door. “That was Karen? The one who gave you a place to live and made you dress down so you’d be safer from men?”

Confused, I nod.

“Then don’t worry about her. I’m going to make her a very wealthy woman.”

“What is happening?” I say slowly. “Why are you still standing here?”

“I was waiting for you, Emery,” he grits out, rapping a fist to his chest. “These last five years, I’ve known you were there. Just out of my reach. It nearly drove me insane. I could smell you. I could feel where you’d been in my apartment. But I couldn’t see you. No one else even compared to the energy you left behind. That energy belonged to the woman I love and I fucking knew it in my soul.” He looks around the room, before his attention zips back to me. “Do you think I’m not going to have our home covered in pictures of you? My desk, my phone, our jet, my wallet. It’s going to be full of every expression you’ve ever made. You think you’re obsessed with me, angel? You haven’t seen anything yet.”

Is this really happening. “B-but…you’re not angry? Or—”

“I’m only angry that you didn’t show yourself sooner, Emery. We could have been together for years,” he rasps. “Years.”

“I’ve only been legal for one.”

“I would have waited forever.” He reaches out, dragging his thumb across my lower lip, his eyes darkening with undisguised hunger. “At the very least, I would have tried my damnedest to wait. Fourteen, huh?”

Relief and desire are making me dizzy. Clarke loves me. He was waiting for me. All this time, it wasn’t my imagination. “It’s complicated.”

His hand leaves my face and I hear him unzipping his pants. Wetness rushes between my thighs on command, but I manage to form my thoughts into words. “At first, I looked up to you. Like a father figure. You would take care of me. You would come save me and be a better father than my own. But…” My breathing harshens. “Something changed after a while, I started to…to think of you when I touched myself. And then you were my father figure and…more. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t stop. Those two roles got wrapped up together.”

Clarke’s fingers spear into my hair and massage my scalp. “And I became your Daddy.”

I nod, my neck losing power at the utterance of that word.

He holds it up. “You’re obsessed with your Daddy.”

My thighs clench together and a shudder passes through me. “Yes.”

Clarke growls. “He’s just as obsessed with his little girl.”