Turn Coat (The Dresden Files 11)

I narrowed my eyes. It was an interesting line of thought. "Such as?"

"Well..." she said. "If someone is naturally quick to anger and prone to fighting, you highlight that part of their personality. You give it more importance than it would have without intervention. If someone is prone to maneuvering politically to take advantage of a situation, you bring that to the forefront of their personality. If someone is nursing a grudge, you shine a spotlight on it in their thoughts, their emotions, to get them to act on it."

I thought about that one for a second.

"It's how I'd do it," Molly said quietly, lowering her eyes.

I looked at the young woman I'd been teaching. When I saw Molly, I always saw her smile, her sense of humor, her youth, and her joy. She was the daughter of a close friend. I knew her family and was often a guest in their home. I saw my apprentice, the effort she put into learning, her frustrations, and her triumphs.

I had never, until that very moment, thought of her as someone who might one day be a very, very scary individual.

I found myself smiling bitterly.

Who was I to throw stones?

"Maybe," I said finally. "It would be one hell of a difficult thing to prove."

She nodded. "But if it was going to be used, there's one person who would without doubt be a target."

I glanced at Luccio. Her mouth was open slightly as she slept. She was drooling a little. It was ridiculous and adorable.

"Yeah," Molly said. "But she would never have let me look. You know she wouldn't have."

"For good reason," I said.

Molly's jaw tensed up for a second. "I know."

"So you thought you'd look while everyone was unconscious," I said. "When you wouldn't get caught."

She shrugged her shoulders.

"You told yourself that you were doing the right thing," I said. "Just a peek, in and out."

She closed her eyes. "I was... Harry, what if she isn't being honest with you? What if all this time, she's been getting close to you because she doesn't trust you. What if she's just like Morgan-only a lot better at hiding it?"

"You don't know what you're talking about," I said.

"No?" She met my eyes. "Whose apprentice was he, Harry? Who taught him to be the way he is? Who did he idolize so much that he modeled himself after her?"

I just sat there for a second.

Molly pressed the issue. "Do you honestly think that she never knew how Morgan treated you?"

I took a deep breath. Then I said, "Yeah. I think that."

She shook her head. "You know better."

"No," I said. "I don't."

"You should," she said fiercely. "I couldn't take the chance that she would let you go down with Morgan. I had to know."

I stared at her for a minute. Then I said, in a very quiet voice, "I always know when I'm being tempted to do something very, very wrong. I start sentences with phrases like, 'I would never, ever do this-but.' Or 'I know this is wrong but.' It's the but that tips you off."

"Harry," Molly began.

"You broke one of the Laws of Magic, Molly. Willfully. Even though you knew it could cost you your life. Even though you knew that it could also cost mine." I shook my head and looked away from her. "Hell's bells, kid. I choose to trust Anastasia Luccio because that's what people do. You don't ever get to know for sure what someone thinks of you. What they really feel inside."

"But I could-"

"No," I said gently. "Even psychomancy doesn't give you everything. We aren't meant to know what's going on in there. That's what talking is for. That's what trust is for."

"Harry, I'm sorr-"

I lifted a hand. "Don't apologize. Maybe I'm the one who let you down. Maybe I should have taught you better." I petted Mouse's head gently, looking away from her. "It doesn't matter at the moment. People have died because I've been trying to save Morgan's life. Thomas might still die. And now, if we do manage to save Morgan's crusty old ass, he's going to report that you've violated your parole. The Council will kill you. And me."

She stared at me helplessly. "I didn't mean to-"

"Get caught," I said quietly. "Jesus Christ, kid. I trusted you."

She wept more heavily now. Her face was a mess. She bowed her head.

"If Morgan goes down for this," I said, "there's going to be trouble like you wouldn't believe. And even more people are going to die." I stood up slowly. "So. I'm going to do everything in my power to save him."

She nodded without looking up.

"So you've got a choice to make, grasshopper. You can come with me, knowing the cost if we succeed. Or you can go."

"Go?" she whispered.

"Go," I said. "Leave now. Run, for as long as you can. Hell, it looks a lot like I'm going to get myself killed anyway. Probably Morgan, too. In that case, things will go to hell, but the Wardens will be way too busy to chase you. You'll be able to ignore what's right all you want, do whatever you like-as long as you don't get caught."

She pressed her arms against her stomach. She sounded like she was about to throw up, through the sobs.

I put a hand on her head and said, "Or you can come with me. You can do something right. Something that has meaning."

She looked up at me, her lovely young face discolored in anguish.

"Everyone dies, honey," I said, very quietly. "Everyone. There's no 'if.' There's only 'when.' " I let that sink in for a moment. "When you die, do you want to feel ashamed of what you've done with your life? Feel ashamed of what your life meant?"

She stared at my eyes for a minute and a half of silence broken only by the sound of her muted weeping. Then her head twitched in a single tiny shake.

"I promise that I'll be beside you," I said. "I can't promise anything else. Only that I'll stand beside you for as long as I can."

"Okay," she whispered. She leaned against me.

I put my hand on her hair for a minute. Then I said gently, "We're out of time. The Wardens will know Morgan is in Chicago within a few hours at most. They might be on their way already."

"Okay," she said. "Wh-what are we going to do?"

I took a deep breath. "Among other things, I'm going to attempt a sanctum invocation," I said.

Her eyes widened. "But... you said that kind of thing was dangerous. That only a fool would take such a chance."

"I agreed to help Donald freaking Morgan when he showed up at my door," I sighed. "I qualify."