Millionaire's Woman

Jack closed his eyes for a moment. ‘God, what a life! You must have hated my guts.’

She shook her head. ‘No, Jack, I missed you and grieved for you, but I didn’t hate you. After all, I was the one who left you and opted for a clean break. I could hardly object when you found someone else. Anyway the sleepwalking phase didn’t last long because I went into labour a month early.’ Kate looked away. ‘I had a Caesarean section, which is why I wouldn’t let you undress me that day. I didn’t want you to see my scar.’

Jack grasped her hand so tightly she protested, and he lifted it to his lips in apology. ‘Go on, darling. Tell me the rest.’

Kate faltered slightly at the endearment, but went doggedly on to talk about the deal with Liz, which meant handing the baby over the moment it was born. But when Kate went into labour both Suttons had such heavy colds they were barred from the maternity ward.

Kate sighed deeply. ‘So I was the first to see her, and I loved her so much, Jack. I used to stand gazing at her for ages in the baby unit. She had to stay there for a while because she came early, and I had to go home without her. It was such a terrible wrench to leave her behind that I told Liz the deal was off. I wanted to keep my baby after all.’

‘What changed your mind?’ asked Jack with compassion.

‘Liz was the only mother I ever knew, remember, and a pretty forceful personality. She played on the guilt angle that responsibility for me had kept her from having a child of her own, and this was a perfect way to repay the debt.’

Kate tried to sound dispassionate as she told Jack how her sister kept hammering on that to support a child Kate would have to work full-time and pay a child-minder. If she did that, Liz threatened to wash her hands of her. Kate would be forced to bring up her baby on her own in some poky bedsitter and farm her out to strangers so she could keep working. At that point post-natal depression hit Kate so hard she was in a terrible state by the time Joanna was discharged and Elizabeth took full advantage of it.

‘I was in no condition to look after a child, physically, mentally or financially, she told me. She, on the other hand, could give my baby a good home, constant care and attention, and when the time came Robert would pay for a good school.’ Kate took in a deep breath. ‘In desperation I finally caved in, totally brainwashed about the good of my child, but I had to stick to Sutton rules. I was forbidden to give my baby her bottle, or bathe and change her, or even pick her up when she was crying in case she bonded to me and not Liz. But I dug my heels in and made two rules of my own. I insisted that I was made Jo’s legal guardian, and that I chose her name. But I had no say in it when they sent her to boarding school at the age of eight,’ Kate added bitterly.

Jack got up and paced round the room like a restless tiger. ‘Did they keep you shut up in a downstairs room again after the baby was born?’

‘No, of course not. But I went back to work far sooner than I should have because it was such torture to watch Liz do all the things I should have been doing for my baby girl. And, in the end, even though it broke my heart to leave her, I answered Anna’s advertisement for a flat share.’

He frowned. ‘Does Anna know about any of this?’

‘No. I told her I was recovering from a broken engagement, which was no lie, Jack. And Anna finds it quite natural that I’m so attached to my “niece”, because she is,too.’

He looked at her questioningly. ‘What do I tell my father?’

‘The truth, what else?’

Jack sat on the end of the chaise and took her hand again. ‘Once Dad told me about meeting Joanna I realised why you won’t marry me. But what I don’t understand,’ he added,‘is why you brought her here to live. You must have known I’d meet her one day.’

Kate shrugged. ‘I thought it didn’t matter if you did. I never saw a photograph of your mother, remember, and Jo doesn’t resemble you or me in any way, except for my kind of body shape. I had no intention of turning up on your doorstep and confronting you with your love child,I assure you.’ She looked down at their clasped hands. ‘Personally, I wasn’t keen on coming back here. Even after all these years I didn’t relish the idea of seeing you play happy families with Dawn. But Joanna was desperate to get away from London after Liz and Robert died,and there was this house, just waiting for us to move into it. Jo fell in love with it, so here we are.’

Jack was silent for a while, then got up and stood over Kate, his eyes implacable. ‘Right. This is what we do. Now I know the truth, you and I simply get married and—’

‘Live happily ever after?’ She shook her head. ‘There’s nothing simple about it. You’re not thinking straight.’

He sat down again, his eyes boring into hers. ‘One thing I do have straight. We must tell Joanna.’

Kate’s eyes blazed. ‘And just what are “we” going to tell her, Jack? That her Daddy married someone else the minute my back was turned, and I gave my baby away like a pound of tea because I couldn’t face life as a single mother? Something,’ she added with bitterness, ‘I’ve regretted every single day of my life since.’

‘Then it’s time to change things.’ Jack’s hand tightened on hers. ‘Surely Joanna could cope with th

e facts if you explained them to her?’

She gazed at him in anguish. ‘How can I do that to her, Jack? She’s just lost the people she knew as parents. It would be like taking them away from her all over again.’

‘She has two real live parents to take their place.’

‘I can’t take the risk.’ Kate shivered. ‘If I tell her the truth she might hate me. I won’t do it, Jack.’

‘Better than having her find out by accident.’

‘I don’t know. Maybe you’re right. But Jo’s so vulnerable right now.’

‘Does she know anything about me?’

‘Only that I’ve been seeing an old friend.’