Since I Saw You (Because You Are Mine 4)
“What?” Kam prompted.
She shrugged. “I tend to cling onto familiar things, like my work, because I’m afraid of change. Of abandonment.”
“Abandonment?” Kam asked.
Her blush deepened. “I know, it sounds ridiculous.”
“No it doesn’t.”
She looked up in surprise. “It doesn’t?”
He shook his head. “No. Not really. You must have been hit pretty hard when your mother and father left the States, leaving you behind. You were close to your grandmother, right?”
“Very,” she said.
“When she passed, and you were all alone in the world. But Noble Enterprises was there. Familiar. Knowable. Comfortable, even, given your history with your grandmother. What’s more, you’re amazingly good at what you do. That gives a feeling of affirmation all on its own. I can understand how all that would make you want to stay.”
“Yeah,” she admitted. “I guess you’re right.”
He stroked her cheek with his thumb. “There’s no reason to look sad about it,” he said quietly. “It’s completely normal. We all want what’s familiar. Sometimes I feel like I’m going to jump out of my own skin in this city. I keep longing for home, and the silence of the woods, and my old routine myself.”
“You do?” she asked, holding his stare. He nodded. “But you came. You’re staying put, despite the fact that you’d rather be home. How come?” she asked.
“Because I realized that unless I stepped out of my comfort zone, I was never going to grow. I’m ready. I’m ready for a change.” His thumb brushed her cheek softly.
Her heart began to pound in her ears in the silence that followed. Angus startled up suddenly, looking around the room. Lin glanced from the golden retriever to Kam with amusement.
“I’d love to know what that dog dreams,” Kam muttered dryly. Angus turned at the sound of his voice, her eyelids falling drowsily when he reached and scratched her behind the ears. “One thing I do know, she’s going to want a bathroom break now that’s she awake. You up for a walk?”
“I’d love one,” Lin replied, thinking that the brisk fall air might clear some of the confusion and chaotic thoughts she’d been having lately about work and Ian. What bothered her most was that she never would have been having these feelings if it weren’t for Kam.
He’d been the catalyst for everything.
• • •
Lin scrambled some eggs, which they ate with toast before they headed out with Angus. They walked south on the lakefront, Kam suggesting they take the path around the museum campus. It was a brilliant, warm fall day with the temperature in the low 60’s. They walked hand in hand, talking about anything and everything—comparing notes on favorite spots in London and Paris, architecture, the kind of music they liked. She learned that his full name was Kamryn Patrick Reardon.
“I told you my mother never gave up an inch of her Irishness,” Kam said sheepishly when Lin exclaimed over how much she loved the name. “The fact that Trevor Gaines seemed irritated by my Irish-sounding name only seemed to make me like it more.”
She recalled what he’d said about how withdrawn and laconic he typically was, and was warmed by the fact that he seemed completely unguarded on that walk. The sunlight sparkling off the great lake seemed to perfectly reflect Lin’s effervescent mood. Angus certainly seemed happy in the sunshine, bounding over to every dog and person she encountered on the lakefront path. If the person or pet seemed interested—which they seemed to be more often than not—Kam let the friendly golden retriever socialize for a moment before he pulled on her leash and Angus good-naturedly walked on with them.
Kam pointed to the western cityscape once they’d made a tour of the picturesque museum campus situated on the lakefront.
“Let’s go this way. There’s a park over here where we can unleash Angus,” he said.
“How do you know so much about the city already?” she asked, puzzled.
“Running,” he stated simply. “I’ve been out nearly every day since I’ve come to Chicago. Gave me a chance to check out the territory. Do you run?”
“Yes,” she said smiling, thinking of his extremely muscular, well-toned body. “But I doubt I could keep up with you.”
“I know how strong you are,” he said, and she thought he referred to having watched her dance. “You could keep up.”
They passed Lucien’s hotel and kept walking south. By the time they reached Coliseum Park, dark clouds were gathering in the west, although the sun still prevailed in the sky. Kam unhooked Angus’s leash in the enclosure, and the golden retriever immediately rushed over to bark and sniff at three other dogs. Lin laughed, watching her.
“If pets are supposed to share their owner’s personalities, you must have a social butterfly hidden somewhere inside you,” she told Kam amusedly.
He grinned, his expression doubtful. “I’d say Angus and I are complete opposites.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Lin murmured, her smile widening as she watched Angus bark and bounce around ebulliently with a chocolate Labrador. “You both certainly have the ability to make others happy.”
He opened his hand along her neck, his thumb feathering her jaw. She looked up at him and blinked. Until she saw the look on his face, she hadn’t fully realized what she’d said. He leaned down and kissed her. Lin knew it was his way of thanking her for telling him he made her happy. She smiled up at him when he lifted his head a few seconds later, knowing her heart was in her eyes. For once, she didn’t hide it. He did make her happy.