Taming the Beast
Grabbing it, I downed the fiery liquid in one swallow, my eyes watering and throat burning through the splutter. Heat spread through my stomach, a languid warmth reaching out into my limbs and spreading a smile over my face. “Why aren’t you angry? I got all up in your face, poking you in the chest—” I broke off to give his chest a loving look, my next thought being that the alcohol had gone straight to my head, “—and threatening to hurt your balls, but you’re not mad at me.”
He bit back a chuckle, thinking better of it as I glared at him. “Sure, I’m angry—”
My stomach performed a summersault.
“—Fucking furious, but not with you, sweetheart.” His finger tilted my chin, lifting my head up to meet his gaze. “Never with you. I would rather die than hurt you in any way.” His lips clamped shut, biting off his words, but they were out there, swimming around in my alcohol fuzzed up brain, multiplying and expanding until they were almost shouting.
“Who are you angry with?” But what I really wanted to ask was: if you feel this way, then why push me away? But I didn’t, I wasn’t that far gone. I willed him to answer me, to cast aside all the half truths and take a chance.
“Myself.” He paused, looking like he would give anything to not continue, but he did, “my dragon.” Another pause, and this time it was his eyes that left mine. He took a deep breath, as though bracing himself. ?
??He abandoned me after Astrid left.”
Chapter 6
Faye
Head spinning, I did what I did best—sorted the information out into relevant categories, assigning levels of priority while looking for connecting links. But I came up blank. “Your dragon abandoned you?”
A sharp nod.
“What does that even mean?” I spoke my thoughts out loud, not thinking about filtering them. This was too important to pussy foot around; he was opening up to me, something I’d been pestering him to do for days. Maybe I could help.
“You can’t fix me, sweetheart.”
“I wasn’t think—”
“Yes, you were. If we’re being honest with each other—brutal, I might add—then give me the courtesy of not lying to my face. You want to fix me. You can’t.” A shrug accompanied the words, a mask to hide his inner turmoil.
My anger bubbled up again. Something about this man just … riled me up, sparking emotions that were at odds with my usual calm outlook on life. Shoving my hands on my hips, I stared him down. “Don’t lie to me then. You’re acting like this doesn’t bother you one little bit. That’s crap—own it.”
“Touché, little spitfire. It eats me alive and spits me out a broken man. Fuck that, a ghost of a man.” Pulling away from the hearth, he straightened, towering over me, his eyes glinting with barely contained rage. “You couldn’t even begin to understand what it feels like to be a shifter that can’t shift.”
“So, you can’t shift.”
“Didn’t I just say that?” His voice came out on a hiss, as though by admitting his problem out loud, judgment would strike him down.
“You’re still the alpha of the Jewelcrest Clan, and still a powerful man.”
His laughter was low and hollow. “For how long? Once I’m found out then I would be challenged, the clan would come under new leadership, be absorbed into another, or be broken up into pieces. Either way, Jewelcrest would cease to exist as we know it.”
“Pretty much what was going to happen as the result of your gambling,” I pointed out.
“A misjudgment on my part.”
Clarity hit me. “You were trying to build the clan up, to make it invincible to attack.”
“Yes and no. I was trying to give myself a cushion to figure things out. Wealth solves a lot of problems.”
“But, Jewelcrest was already rich.”
“Not so, sweetheart. After my parents died and Astrid left, I discovered that things weren’t quite as comfortable as they had appeared. Astrid taking her inheritance with her had practically emptied the coffers. We were rich in land and valuable artifacts, but any money left was earmarked for clan business.”
“Like the village?”
Another nod. “Catch on fast, don’t you?”
This earned him a smack to the chest. “Try and control your urge to talk down to me, Bash.”