Ruin (The Rhodes 1)

“I’ll give you one last chance because of the glorious targets we eliminated side by side.” She studies me. “Let’s leave. Now. Together.”

For someone who never gives their targets any chance, Celeste, like me, must’ve changed in the time we’ve been apart. She had always wanted to belong somewhere. The Pit did that for long years but since she’s insisting on leaving, she must’ve got bored with that place. She’s lost again, with nowhere to belong.

I stop encircling her, she doesn’t. “Considering our history, I’ll also give you one last chance. Apologise to Mae and if— only if— she forgives you, I’ll spare your life.”

She laughs so loud that I cringe. “You want me to apologise to your pet? Me, who never apologised in my life?” She points her knife at me, eyes narrowing. “When did you become such a boring human, Aaron? Is it this place? Or the girl?” When I don’t say anything, she continues. “Wake up, Aaron! She’s everything you can’t be. A mere boring existence. Is she the reason behind the delusional freedom you’ve painted for yourself?”

My hand tightens around the knife’s handle and I resume circling her. I suck in a deep breath, not speaking unt

il I’ve made sure my voice will be in its best monotonic tone. “The delusional freedom as you call it is still better than the alternative.”

“With the alternative being your true self?” Her voice escalates with each word.

“What do you know about my true self?” I twirl the knife. “You’ve only seen what I’ve shown you: the blood version.”

She huffs, slowly but steadily closing the distance between us. She’s always been better at close range. “Are there even other versions?”

“Perhaps no. Perhaps yes.” I step backwards for my ideal two metres’ range. “All I know is that the blood version can’t rule my life anymore. It became dull after a while.”

“You’re a hypocrite. The last person I imagined would be. Since you invited a weakness upon yourself, it’s only fair that I use it.” Her voice is calmer than the estate’s silence. “Goodbye, Aaron.”

We throw our knives at the same time. I aim at her carotid artery. She at my heart. With a slight deviation of my upper body, I escape her knife. The metal of hers clinks against the stony pavement as my knife reaches its target.

Celeste falls with a thud. She clutches her neck with one hand, her eyes almost bulging out of their sockets.

With quick strides, I’m by her side, looking down at her last breaths. “This is the version who would’ve spared your life if you didn’t mess with Mae.” I reach my hand to retrieve the knife. “Goodbye, Celeste.”

Something shines in her free hand.

A gun. Fuck. When the hell did she start using guns?

Before I can move, sharp pain penetrates my chest. My lungs revolt at the lack of breaths. Somehow, I end up on the ground, clutching my chest. My vision becomes strings of blurry black and grey. I shake my head. The motion heightens my dizziness. I’m going to pass out.

Think, Aaron. Think. Remember trauma cases.

A shot to the chest. Almost blacking out. This must be a vital organ. Heart? Lung? Liver? Pancreas? I can’t feel them. I can’t fucking feel any of my organs. The pain camouflages them, clawing at my nerve endings with freezing numbness. My heartbeat drums in my head. Maybe not the heart? My pulse decreases, kicking oxygen out of my limbs with nauseating determination. I can scarcely hear it in my ears anymore.

I gasp for breath, but it doesn’t seem to reach my lungs. It’s the lungs. They’re collapsing. Pneumothorax? I can hear the slight sucking sound. I cough, the metallic taste explodes in my mouth. Hemothorax. Fuck. It’s Hemopneumothorax.

A shroud of darkness forms at the back of my mind, announcing the shutting down of my system. Is this the end?

But I didn’t even find the version I want yet.

I didn’t even see Mae one last time.

Chapter Twenty

Mae

I rub at my eyes. I won’t stumble to tears. Yet, uneasiness weighs on my chest like an old aching burden. I toss left and right in my bed, fighting the springing moisture beneath my eyelids. The discomfort keeps suffocating me, draining my energy, cutting my air supply like Aaron did.

Why does it hurt so much? Aaron is a killer. The fact that he tried to kill me shouldn’t have surprised me. Yet, it hurts. Being on the brink of death hurt. Being choked by the man who became my reality hurt. But what hurt the most is my idiotic surrender to his touch prior that. The stupid belief that he could be a human under those layers of ice.

The tears that fight their way out are a translation of my self-loathing. A feeling I always considered beneath me. Yet, here I am, cursing my foolishness, wanting to rip my disloyal heart out of my chest.

Who the hell is this girl? Mae isn’t an idiot. Mum and Dad didn’t bring me up to surrender to this state.

I jerk up in bed, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my palms. I won’t fall again. If stoning my heart is what it takes to end this stupidity, then I’ll become heartless.