Finding Our Course (Finding our Way 3)

“You saw me, Quinn. You lived with me. You know how badly he hurt me.”

“Devon, I hate to tell you this, but being the awesome BFF that I am, it’s time you wake up to a dose of reality. I was there, too, when Holli made her announcement. I watched the devastation and dread fill Bryce’s eyes. It was obvious to me he cared a lot more for you than he’d ever let on. But because of the situation and impending breakdown, it was my decision to never bring it up again. Months later, when you were starting to recover, it was obvious you had changed. Sure, you still tell goofy jokes and have a quirky sense of humor, but now you’re guarded.

“You’ve never given any other guy a chance. And to be honest, I was surprised at your reaction when Holli miscarried. You sent a fucking card. You didn’t call. You didn’t go home. You never even really acknowledged the loss and how it may have affected Bryce. You were a different Devon.”

“I was hurting still and trying to protect myself.”

“From what? You had to know that if things progressed you couldn’t hide from their relationship forever.”

“I wasn’t hiding!”

“Yes, you were. But that’s okay. I’ve supported you forever. I’ll continue to support you until we’re old spinsters rockin’ the nursing home. But if you want my advice, let it go. Be kind, be funny, be yourself. Lose the tension, because believe me, I’m sure everyone around you feels it. Be his friend, Devon, just like you were. Remember the whole maturity thing? This is the time to show it. You have to let go of the past, it’s done.”

Tears overflow onto my cheeks, and I let a small sob escape. “Quinn, I’ll try. But sometimes I still lie in bed at night with a racing heart and feel the pain crushing me. It makes me so mad, because it’s ridiculous how obsessed I was with him. Almost creepy.”

“No, it’s called young love. First love. Some say it’s the most intense of your lifetime. I, for one, believe that theory having watched you.”

“How’d you get so philosophically smart?”

“I read every smut book that comes out. I’m finding them to be extremely educating about love and sex. Maybe when we’re in Miami, I can test the sex part out.”

“You better not. Remember, we’re splitting a room. No more hairy ass wake up calls for me.”

“That was one time!”

“Still have nightmares about the poodle I was sure he sat on.” I double over laughing at my own joke. If I’m blessed to live to one-hundred, I’ll never forget walking into my kitchen one morning and seeing Quinn wrapped up on the couch with her date from the night before. Before I could stop myself, I screamed because his ass was bare, and I swear the way his balls were hanging made it look like he had a toupee down there. He jumped up quickly, which put his whole package on display. He was just a hairy guy.

“Fucking Devon, it wasn’t that bad!”

I’m laughing too hard to respond. The tears running down my cheeks are now happy tears. Quinn starts giggling with me, and soon, we are both gasping, trying to catch our breaths.

“Okay, smartass. Since you started it, let’s play the game.”

“No way!”

“Oh yeah, bitch. It’s only fair.”

“You know what? You’re right. I’ll give you four. That’s it.”

“Four will do because I’m picking my favorites.”

“If you have favorites, that means you already know the problem. Why do you love this game?”

“Because it’s fucking hilarious. How do we both continue to pick up the weirdest guys on a campus of twenty-four thousand?”

“Don’t know, but go. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be alone.”

“Mmmm, where should I start? Let’s go with Mandel.”

“That’s easy. It was the curry. He smelled like curry. It oozed out of his body like he bathed in the shit. When he tried to kiss me, I almost threw up in his mouth. It took me a week to get the smell off me.”

“I love that! Tell me about Bobby again?”

“He humped my back! Don’t you remember? We were lying on the couch, and he started moving weird. He thought I was asleep, which is creepy in itself, but then he finished, reached over me for a Kleenex, and then tried to snuggle.

“Then there’s Eli, who had awesome lips. Sad that he didn’t know how to use them. At all.”

Roars come through the phone as Quinn continues to laugh.