Surrendering (Surrender 1)

“I had plans with the guys and I wanted to dance. “

“You can dance at The Steamroom.”

I remain silent.

“Raven, are you avoiding me?”

“Not at all, I’m just busy. School started and I’m working on a project with my mom for a local charity. I have tomorrow off so I went out tonight. No big deal.”

“I haven’t heard from you in weeks and I begged my sisters to get you there tonight. Then they show up and tell me you didn’t want to come. The last time I saw you, I thought I was taking you home and we were going to talk. What the fuck?”

“What the fuck? You want to know what the fuck? I come to your show after you practically beg me. Then I show up and some bleach blonde Band Bunny is all over you. Then she practically fucks you in front of me and you don’t even push her off. I’m there the whole night and I never saw you again. And just to let you know, you haven’t contacted me in three weeks.”

I’m practically seething by this point. Who does he think he is? I don’t have a lot of experience, but I know I’m not putting up with this shit. I lived with Robbie, Finn, Max, and tons of other alpha males all throughout my life. Declan Collins is not going to walk all over me and now is the time to let him know that.

“Are you fucking Finn?”

“Are you kidding me? No!”

“Are you fucking Gabe, Tripp, Jimi, or anyone else?”

You have got to be kidding me! I’m going to explode. How dare he?

“Are you fucking Sami?”

He stares at me. His jaw is locked and his eyes are intense. He keeps up the stare down until I think he’s not going to answer me.

“I was, not now.”

Well, at least I know. It doesn’t hurt any less, but at least I know.

He slugs back half of his beer, “Your turn, which one are you fucking? I saw you dancing at The Steamroom. I’ve seen how guys size you up. Those guys may say they’re your friends, but I bet they’re jacking off to you.”

I thought I could do this with class, but he just pissed me off beyond belief. I’m not sure why I do it, but it’s now or never.

I walk right over and get in his face, “No Declan, I’m not fucking them because I am not fucking anyone. Never have. And those guys are not jacking off to me because that would go against the code. My brother would kill them. I’ve been off limits since I was six years old. So you can kiss my ass.”

I turn and walk to my room without another glance at him.

*****

The next day is uneventful and I decide to have a movie marathon tonight. It’s Abbi and Ella’s night with their dad and Finn’s going out with some guys.

Since I walked out on Declan last night, I haven’t been able to think of anything else. I can’t quite understand why he’s gotten under my skin. I’m pretty tough when it comes to guys. I’ve had a few boyfriends, but no one has ever ignited me like he does. When I think back to the few kisses and words we shared, I feel ridiculous. Even his sisters warned me that he’s not relationship material. What was I thinking when I went to his show? Just because he invited me, didn’t mean he meant anything by it. I’m an idiot.

Now Declan knows I’m a virgin and probably thinks I’m some inexperienced girl that can’t get laid. I’ve remained a virgin by my own choice. I believe in the whole romance and relationship thing. I will not make a fool of myself anymore. When he’s around, I’ll make myself scarce and act like nothing ever happened. Maybe Abbi and Ella will go with me tomorrow to have drinks and then we can see if Damon is working.

That’s a great idea! I pick up my phone to text Abbi before I lose my nerve.

Me: Abbi- u & E wanna go get drinks and Italian tomorrow night?

She immediately responds

Abbi: Sounds great! Are we looking for a hot Italian bartender?

Me: Maybe?

Abbi: It’s about time! C U 2morrow!