Saving Mel

But it wasn’t the panic I was dwelling on.

It was how easily he let me go when I paused.

“Mew stay?”

I looked down at the little boy who was staring up at me and my heart started to break.

“I’ve gotta go back home sometime, buddy,” I said.

“You come back?” Liam asked.

I smiled at him before I picked him up and placed him on my lap. His arms wrapped around me as his head settled onto my chest. I rocked the little boy side to side, allowing myself to be in the moment with this precious child. I held him close as Evan cleaned up Hadley, then I pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his head.

“I’ll come back,” I said, into his hair. “I promise.”

Liam answered by snuggling closer into my body.

Evan cleaned up the dishes and Liam eventually scampered off to play. Hadley was placed in her playpen so she could roam without getting hurt, then Evan walked over to the fireplace. He stoked up a fire before the two of us emptied the coffee pot, sitting next to one another while the fiery flames licked their heat over our bodies.

“You know, I could use a babysitter since our nanny is sick,” Evan said.

“You have a nanny for the kids?” I asked.

“I do. But she got pretty sick a few days ago. Between the snowfall and her still not feeling well, we probably won’t see her for another week or two. But that puts me in a bind.”

“So, you’re watching your kids for your brother and you need a nanny to help. How long is he gone for?” I asked.

“Long enough for me to need a nanny to help,” he said.

His tone was guarded, same as the last time I asked a question about the kids’ parents. There was something he wasn’t telling me, and it made me slightly uneasy. Though I really couldn’t blame him, could I? He didn’t exactly know my deepest secrets.

“Okay. I mean, I’m not trying to be a smartass, but you don’t work so, why exactly do you need a nanny?”

He looked at me for a moment and let out a small laugh. “I guess that does sound kind of silly, doesn’t it? Well, mostly it’s because I really have no clue what to do with two kids by myself. But also, I occasionally build furniture and take it into town to sell it.”

“You do?” I asked, intrigued. He had told me he was a tech guy, so this new piece of information was surprising.

“I do. Actually, everything in this room and the kitchen, I built myself,” he said, a hint of pride in his voice.

“Wow,” I said, looking around at the furniture. I would never have guessed it hadn’t come from a store. It was rustic, yet still looked expensive. “Where do you work?” I asked.

“In my shed out back,” he said. My hands instantly gripped around the coffee mug as my entire body pulled taut.

I felt the palms of my hands sweating as images started to bombard the forefront of my mind.

I closed my eyes and took deep breaths. I focused on the hot coffee mug in my hands. I tried to think about anything else—anything that would get my train of thought away from what was about to happen. I thought about horses and unicorns bouncing through fields. I thought about the Northern Lights and staring at them from igloos. I thought about the rolling waves of the ocean and the mountain peaks of the Himalayas.

I thought about Evan and his sparkling eyes; anything to pull me out of the panic attack I felt closing in.

“Melanie? Are you okay?” he asked.

Opening my eyes, I could feel the trembling in my body slowly subsiding. Evan’s eyes. There was something calming about them. It took every ounce of energy I had to turn myself toward him, but when I did I locked on his eyes immediately. I could tell they were worried, studying me closely.

The longer he looked at me, the more I felt the panic and anxiety slowly slipping from my body.

“I’m okay,” I said breathlessly. “I didn’t know you did woodworking. Do you enjoy it?”

He studied me hard and I could tell he wanted to ask. I knew he was curious and I knew he was aware that I was hiding something from him. But the two of us, we had plenty to hide. I knew there was more to the story than just his niece and nephew staying with him ‘for a little while’.

“I do,” he finally said. “It’s calming. Helps to center me when I’m feeling—overwhelmed.”

“Well, you know I’ve already become quite attached to these little ones, I’d love to help out if you need someone,” I said.

“I would really appreciate that. They obviously adore you too. And I’ll pay you for it. You said you needed a job, so maybe we can help one another out.”