Ascended (War of the Covens 3)

Jaeden’s lips trembled. She had lost him. She had really done it now. This wasn’t how the mating was supposed to be. How could she and Caia mess it up this badly?

Ryder sighed wearily and dropped his arms from the cage he’d made around her, taking a step back. “Talk to your mother, Jaeden. She needs you.”

The tears spilled down her cheeks and through the blur she saw him pause, watching the show of emotion with surprised alert. When he didn’t make a move toward her, Jae was humiliated by the unexpected and uncontrolled sob that burst from deep within her chest. Still, he made no move toward her, but he wasn’t leaving. And she took comfort in the way he clenched his fists as if stopping himself from going to her.

After a moment, she pulled in a shuddering breath. “And you?” she managed. “Do you, Ryder?”

He hissed and then replied, “Do I what?”

“Still need me?”

Instead of replying, he turned away. “Just talk to your mom.”

Panic floored her and she tripped a few steps toward him. “Ryder, wait.”

“No,” he threw over his shoulder as he walked away from her.

Just say it! There’s nothing left to lose.

“I’m sorry!” she cried. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry—” She began to cry for real, all the tears she’d kept locked up since her father’s death. She slid to the ground, burying her shame-faced head in her hands, trying unsuccessfully to control the rib-cracking sobs taking over her body.

Then like the relief of sun after days of relentless rain, warm, familiar arms encircled her, drawing her into an equally strong and familiar chest. Ryder tightened his hold on her, stroking her hair and rocking her as she let it all out. At the feel of him, eventually Jaeden’s cries eased. As his scent flooded her senses, she shuddered for another reason. She wanted him. She wanted him to make it all go away.

Slowly, Jae lifted her head to look at him, his face inches above her. She winced inwardly at the uncertain look in his eyes as he gazed down at her. Panicking at the thought of never being able to erase that look, Jaeden scrambled to cradle his face in her hands.

“Ryder,” she gasped, pulling herself even closer. “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean any of it, I swear. I was just so angry, I—”

“We were all angry, Jaeden,” he said through clenched teeth, but his eyes betrayed his desire as they drew down to her mouth.

Jae took heart in that. “Ryder.” She locked onto his gaze, resolute. “I love you. I never stopped loving you … I was just so—”

“Just so what?” he demanded, shaking her by the shoulders. “What, Jaeden? What was so damn important that it was worth putting me through the worst weeks of my life?”

Explain it, Jae, explain. It’s your only shot at keeping him.

“My dad knew me so well,” she whispered against his lips. “Losing him was like losing a part of my own soul.”

“Jae—”

“Let me finish, please.” She looked up into his eyes. Gods, he looked so determined to not forgive her. “But with you, it’s like you are my soul. You’re such a huge part of me that I don’t think I’ll survive losing you. I thought if I could keep all the people I cared about at a distance, it might not hurt so much if anything were to happen to them. The thought of losing you, Ryder … I won’t come back from that. I love you so much it terrifies me—”

Her words were cut off as he crushed her mouth beneath his own, his kiss demanding and punishing, taking everything she had. And she gave it to him, kissing him back with as much abandon and need. Ryder pressed her backward, sending her crashing onto her back on the damp ground. She barely noticed they were outside while he continued to kiss her as if this were their last moment on earth. His large body pressed upon hers, brushing across her deliciously as he braced his arms on either side of her head. Jaeden growled into his mouth, sliding her hands into his hair and bringing him down on top of her with one hard tug. That seemed to sever any control he might have had.

She sizzled with fragile excitement as he pulled away from their kiss long enough to tug his T-shirt over his head. He then relieved Jae of her shirt and bra. The feel of his rough hands on her overheated skin drove her to the edge, and Jaeden reached for him again, whispering love words against his skin as her hands did some roaming of their own, her lips pressing hot kisses to his throat and jaw. Ryder groaned under her assault, and she felt him undoing the buttons on her jeans. Desire for her mate flooded from the pit of her belly, flushing her skin to the roots of her hair.