A Lover's Lament

Baghdad.

Fuck me.

My guys welcomed me back warmly and filled me in on the uneventful past four days. I have to admit that it did lift my spirits being back with them. They are my brothers, and if I can’t be with Katie, being with my guys is the next best thing.

It’s been weeks since my return, and although it’s been difficult, the importance of our work here and the well-being of my soldiers help to ease the pain of missing her. Thankfully, most days I’m too busy to let it dominate my head.

I call Katie every chance I get, and we’ve even started chatting via webcam. Lord knows I couldn’t go six weeks without laying eyes on her beautiful face. While I’d rather have her with me, being able to see her makes things a lot easier.

Fighting for computer use, on the other hand, has been a pain in my ass. But I’ve learned to bring a book with me to help get me through the wait. Which is why I’m currently seated outside the closed communications center door reading The Notebook, doing my best to conceal the cover. Katie insisted I read it, and I’ll admit I was a little skeptical at first, but Noah and Allie have managed to capture my attention. I’ve found myself imagining it’s the two of us instead, and I’ve even laughed a few times, because when I think about the journey Katie and I have been on to get where we are, it almost feels like a love story in and of itself. Like a novel that was destined to be, set in place long before either of us were even born. She and I were made for each other, and it blows my mind that I couldn’t look past my own stubborn ways to see that long before now.

The opening of the communications center door grabs my attention and I quickly close the book, hiding it in my cargo pocket while rising to my feet. Adams comes through the doorway and winks at me, motioning toward his dick.

“All yours, buddy!” He cackles and pats me hard on the back.

“Hey, man, thanks a lot for taking our shift tonight. We got you guys next time.”

“No problem. I know you’d do it for me.” He slaps my hand before exiting. I make my way inside, shut the door and take a seat at the computer. The anticipation is a fucking rush. It overwhelms my senses and sends pulses throughout my body. I love getting to see her beautiful, smiling face staring back at me and hearing that sweet, melodic laugh.

The webcam pops up and I send a request to Katie, then wait impatiently for her to answer. It rings for longer than I would expect, and I can’t help but worry that something’s come up. I’d be heartbroken if that’s the case. The whole reason I switched shifts with Adams was because I wanted to see Katie, and this was the only time that worked for her. I mean, my guys did want the night off and all, but it definitely helped me out.

The flicker of the screen and Katie’s face popping up sends a wave of exhilaration over me. I feel like a fucking kid on Christmas morning.

“Devin!” She smiles wide and blows me a kiss. “How are you, babe?”

“God damn, I’m better now!” I laugh.

“How was it today?” She knows I won’t tell her the whole truth. I don’t want her to worry about me more than she already does, but I also don’t want to lie to her.

“It wasn’t too bad actually. This neighborhood has been getting out of control, and there seems to be a shitload of resentment between the Sunnis and Shiites. They just fucking hate each other…” My voice trails off and my eyes stray from the screen. I don’t like talking about this stuff with her, not when I’m so far away and I can’t be there to ease her concern

. “It’s been pretty quiet though. I think we’re making headway. There’s talk there might be an increase in soldiers out here, so that’s good.”

“Is it?” she says and almost immediately covers her face with her hands. “Sorry, Devin, I didn’t mean that. I just want you home is all, and the news…” She stops herself by taking her bottom lip between her teeth. I love when she does that.

“No, baby, you’re okay. I mean, it’s not like I don’t think about that stuff, you know that. I just hate seeing my guys overworked … getting in from mission, sleeping for a few hours and then getting called right back out. It’s wearing them out.” She nods, appearing to digest my words. Katie is so patient in conversation, always attentive and waiting for people to completely finish what they have to say before she contributes. I’ve always been attracted to that in a woman, and I smile widely as I think about it.

“Wait”—she giggles—“what’s going on in that brain of yours?”

“Just you. I love you, you know that?”

“Forever and ever?”

“Forever and ever, babe,” I say, winking at her. Moments like these are when video just isn’t enough. I want to pull her into my arms, wrap her in warmth and kiss her passionately. I feel throbbing in my dick and unintentionally form a devious smile.

“Now what are you thinking about?” she purrs, her words thick with that playful yet sexy tone she uses when she really wants to get me worked up.

“What I think about twenty-four-seven is all. No biggie,” I say, laughing and readjusting my cock.

“I saw that!” she squeals. “Does somebody want to come out and play?”

“Don’t fuck with me, Kit Kat.” I force the smile from my face and give her my best tough guy look, the one that brings grown men to their knees. Katie just smiles.

This girl fucking owns me.

“I’m not fucking with you,” she says, her eyes hooded. “I miss you.” I can see her hand slide down and out of view, and a crimson flush slowly creeps up her neck. Her eyes are burning with desire and it’s sexy as hell. I fucking want her. “I’m all alone, and I want you inside me so bad that it actually fucking hurts.” Her words send surges of pleasure through my body.

“Fuck, baby.” My words are hushed as I’m overtaken by a desperate need to be inside of her. To take all of her and look into her eyes, knowing that from here on out, I will be the one and only man to have her. “Do you know how fucking bad I want you? Do you know how much you creep into my thoughts, and my dreams, and my subconscious? You’re my addiction, Katie.”