From the Ashes (Possessed 2.50)

Million-dollar question.

Looking around for what I’m not sure, I get on the bike behind him. Placing my hands on his hips, I gingerly hang on.

Laughing at me, he pulls my hands further around him. “Right here, sweet stuff.”

“What about a helmet?” I finally think to ask just as he pulls the throttle back.

“Just wait,” he directs. Wait for what?

Immediately, I feel him release the clutch and hit the road. The wind in my hair hitting my face is one of the most soothing things I’ve ever felt. The vibration of the machine between my legs is hypnotic. I’m soon lulled into a sense of freedom. With nothing holding me down, I take in… Everything. For the first time in my life, I can feel all the bad things fall away at once.

Gripping his waist tighter, I feel his muscles ripple beneath my fingers. Strumming them up and down his abs like a guitar, I lay my head on his back and realize in this one single moment, I’m happy.

On the heal of that, though, comes the guilt and shame. My eyes pop open to watch as the happiness I felt for a split-second slips away to invade someone else. Always someone else.

Pulling away from his back, any autonomy I’ve experienced is lost to me. I have been such a shitty person. I don’t deserve any happiness that tries to fight its way into my life. I never would. I’ll be spending my life trying to make up for it, helping others find that moment of bliss.

Declan

Her change is swift and immediate. I feel it the moment her fingers tense in their sensual caress of my abs. Having her plastered to my back the way she is, has me feeling like a king.

I thought putting her on my Thunder Black Indian Scout Sixty motorcycle would free some of her inhibitions and for a split second, I felt it did. When she tightened up behind me, I wanted to tell her to shut her mind off, to just enjoy the freedom. I have a feeling, though, that no matter what I say, the demons in her mind are going to control her better than I ever could.

The small diner I’m taking her to is just around the corner now, and come hell or high water, I’m breaking ground with her tonight. I don’t care that she’s supposed to be a job; she’s a gorgeous woman that I’m more than interested in, and she’s hurting. Far greater than anyone in her life probably knows.

Pulling up to our destination, I shut my bike off. I can hear her heavy breathing behind me and know she’s fighting for control. I decide to take it from her.

Climbing off my bike, I turn to her, clasping her face in my hands. “When you’re with me,” I say to her and am shocked to see her eyes are blank slates. She’s completely shut down. “You shut your brain off. I’m in control, Ashley, and I won’t let you ruin that, you understand me?” I can’t let her lack of emotion sway me. She needs someone to take the reins, and I plan to be that someone.

Fire enters her eyes at my demand, and I can’t begin to explain how thrilled I am. She’s going to fight me, and I’m going to reap the rewards, but just when I think she’s going to argue with me, her eyes dart to the diner.

“Nice…place,” she comments; disbelief in her voice.

It might look like we’re about to walk on the set of Grease, but the food is amazing. Heavy on carbs, and high on life. Dragging her behind me, we go in and sit where we like. I’ve come here often enough that they know me, so I grab menus on the way past the hostess station.

As Ashley sits down in the booth, I signal the waitress who just came out from the kitchen for two coffees. At her nod, I sit, too. I watch Ash as she looks around and takes in the retro surroundings before staring into her lap, playing with her shirt.

“Tell me something,” I say.

“What?” she asks.

“Anything you want.” I would like her to open up on her own.

“I’m sure you’ve read all about me by now,” she counters.

That’s true, but I want to hear it from her pouty lips. “I have. My file doesn’t tell me everything, though.”

“What are you missing then?”

“The things you’re hiding,” I deadpan. I know she’s covering up secrets.

“Who says I’m hiding anything?” She can’t look me in the eyes.

“I know what you did, Ashley.”

“T

hen you know I deserve everything I’ve gotten since then.” Her voice has gone so quiet I strain to hear her.