Before Noah (Daniels Family 3)

“I fucked up,” I confess. “I left Em alone. I should have been living in that fucking house with her by now, and she would have been guarded. This wouldn’t have fucking happened.” Banging my fist against the wall has the nurse glaring at me again from her station. She’s bandaged my hand up three times now because I keep hitting walls, and they all seem to be cement.

“This is nobody’s fault but that asshole's,” Arsen growls.

Logically, I know he’s right. If this guy was going to attack Ember, me being there wouldn’t have stopped him. I only wish we’d apprehended him sooner.

The door to Ember’s room opens and all three of us stand, spinning to face whoever is coming out. Marina exits quietly, and you can tell she’s been crying. Arsen opens his arms for his wife, and she sails into them.

Waiting for her to speak is killing me, but I know how close she is to Ember and how hard s

eeing her like this is.

It’s slowly destroying my soul, and the longer I spend away from her, the harder it is to continue to function.

“She doesn’t want to do it. She doesn’t want to know if that monster raped her.” Marina’s chin wobbles as she spits the last words out like a curse. “Noah.” She steps forward, reaching for my hand. “You have to be strong for her right now. Stronger than you ever have been, and when she talks, I need you to listen, truly listen to what she’s telling you because I’ve never seen Em so forlorn.”

I can only nod my head because now, I’m even more afraid of what he did to her and how she’s affected. Swallowing through the lump in my throat, I slip into her room. Thea is lying on the bed beside Ember playing with her hair and humming. When she sees me, she leans into Em’s back and whispers something in her ear before waving me over. Sliding off the bed, she encourages me to take her place.

Gingerly crawling in behind Ember, I’m not sure where to touch her because I still don’t know the extent of her injuries, and it fucking hurts that she's shut me out.

“Love her, Noah. Tell her how much and keep doing it,” Thea says at my back before taking her leave.

Leaning up on an elbow so I can stare down at my beautiful woman, I brush the hair away from her neck, and I have to force down the rage slithering through my veins when I see the fingerprints on her neck. He strangled her repeatedly. That I can surmise from the different bruises.

Dropping my head to the back of hers, I trace a finger up and down her arm before speaking. “Ember, my light, my stars. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’m sorry we didn’t catch him sooner. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you.”

Her head nods, so I know she hears me.

I’m lost at what to do here. Apologies aren’t what she needs, and no words I say will take away what happened.

Drawing the piece of paper I’ve been holding onto all day out of my back pocket, I gently place it down in front of her. “I started writing these because I knew you didn’t want to listen to my voice, to hear my excuses. I thought, if I could put onto paper what I was feeling for you, then maybe you would grant me an opening to tell you how much I love you because Em, baby, you’re my world.”

“I know, Noah,” she croaks, and I wince at how much pain she must be in. Rolling backwards, so she’s staring up at me, the bruising on her face physically hurts me. Makes me wish I’d pounded his face a little harder than I had.

Her one eye is swollen shut, she has stitches along her eyebrow and jaw. Her lip is split open, and her cheek sports butterfly bandages. Bending down, I lay light kisses to each injury before gently capturing her lips. “I love you, Em.”

“I love you too, Noah.” Looking down at the paper in her hand, she unfolds the ends and begins to read quietly. “I seek your forgiveness, hoping it exists.”

“I’ll wait a lifetime if that’s what you need from me.”

“Oh, Noah.” When she raises her other hand, I frown when I see the cast around her palm and wrist as she gently strokes my face. “I’ve already forgiven you.”

It’s not until she says those words that I realize how much I needed to hear them. “Thank you, Ember.” I kiss each finger before placing her hand back down on the bed.

“I have to tell you something, Noah.” Her tone is grave, but there’s nothing she can say that would make me flinch.

“I never intended to keep it a secret. I just found out a few days ago, and I’ve been processing it. Trying to figure out how I feel and how I could make it all work.”

“Whatever it is, I’m here for you. You’re not alone.”

“I know.” She nods and looks away quickly. “I’m pregnant, Noah.”

Okay. Maybe I was wrong.

I flinch a little, and I’m glad as hell her eyes are still downcast because it’s not for the reason she would think. I’m surprised, but not totally. We weren’t careful, and frankly, I was hoping for it if I’m honest with myself. Because then she would be tied to me forever.

“And is he/she okay? Did he…?” Fuck. The more I think about it, this asshole not only hurt Ember but our baby. I’ll fucking kill him.

“No. As far as the doctors can tell, everything is fine.”