The Initiation (Darkness Within Duet 1)

“The problem you have, Harper, is the fact you care. You give a shit. I don’t. I stopped giving a shit a long time ago. No one cares about us, not really. Teachers, cops, social workers, they’re all there to do a job. You know what I realized?” She shook her head. “Every single person I’ve come across has a price.”

“A price?”

“Yes, a price. An amount they’re willing to take to do bad things. Once you realize how fucked they all are, it makes you stop. Your mother had a price.”

“Draven, don’t.”

“You don’t want to hear it because it’s true. Her price was your father’s love. Everyone else could go fuck themselves. She didn’t think about you or what it would do to you when she hurt herself.”

Pain flooded her as she stared up at Draven.

His words were so … right, and she hated him for it.

Anger filled her. She wanted nothing more than to hit him and to hurt him. Only, she couldn’t do it. Why hurt him when it wasn’t him that pissed her off? It was her mother. She’d killed herself for selfish fucking reasons, and it angered her, even now.

“Let it out,” Draven said.

She shook her head, stumbling away from him. Breaking from his body and the tree, she walked through the dirt, slipping in a wet patch until she fell to the ground. Taking in deep breaths, she tried to think of everything and anything that wasn’t her mother.

Cutting off the image of the blood.

She knew he was right.

Her mother’s price had been her father’s love. Ian had walked away from the both of them, cut them both off as if they didn’t matter to him. Passed them over for Hannah. She still didn’t know who Hannah was.

Did she even want to know?

“Come on, it’s time for you to get home.”

He lifted her up out of the dirt. She didn’t fight him as they walked back to his car. Her head pounded. Pain filled her body, and as he helped her into the passenger seat, she gave up to him, letting him guide her, take control.

One glance in the mirror, she saw how pale she was. Everything had been sucked out of her body. The truth was a hard thing to accept, but what more could she do?

There was not much to the drive home as she lived so close to the woods. She didn’t even notice the passing houses as he drove. Only when she and Draven were entering her home did she finally focus.

“I’m going to call us a pizza.”

“Don’t worry about me. I think I’m all pizza’d out right now.”

“Pizza’d out? How does anyone get tired of pizza?”

“Oh, it happens.” She didn’t bother going to the kitchen.

She went straight upstairs to her bathroom, removing her clothes and throwing them in the laundry basket. Stepping under the spray of water, she relished the cold chill that rushed over her from the water. She didn’t turn it up, wanting to freeze. Wishing more than anything to feel the cold. To feel anything other than the pain right now.

Eyes closed, she tried to think of sunshine and long summers.

Water.

Anything but the memory of what she was trying to escape.

She let out a scream as Draven banded his arm around her waist.

“It’s okay. It’s just me.” He pressed a kiss to her shoulder, and she tensed.

“You’re naked, aren’t you?” It was a stupid question. She knew it was, and yet she still asked it.

“You know I am.” He stroked a hand down her arm. “You were crying.”

“I was?”

“Yes. Sobbing. I’ve got you now.”

“I don’t know what the hell is going on with me.”

“You’re grieving. Did you even cry when you found your mother?” he asked.

She shrugged. The only thing she remembered was screaming. Of begging for help. Her hands shook so much.

“I don’t remember.”

“You need to let it go.”

“Is that what you do? You let things go?”

“I don’t cry. For anything or anyone.”

“I don’t believe that.”

He laughed. “You should. I’m not a good person.”

“You keep telling me that, and yet you’re here.”

“I took your first kiss, Harper. I watched you kiss my three friends. I’m in the shower naked with you. I want you to be part of us. You don’t know all that means now, but soon, you will.”

“You make it sound like it’s inevitable that I’m going to pick you guys.”

“You’d be a fool not to.”

“You’re biased.”

“I know what we can give you and what you can give us. You’d never be alone again. We’d never push you aside or take our lives. We’d be everything for you.”

“And if I say no?”

“Then, I’ll leave. We’d all leave you alone.”

The thought of being without them scared her. They had helped her in the past few weeks. “I don’t want you to leave.”

“Then I won’t leave. You’re going to have to make a choice soon, Harper.” He kissed her shoulder. “For your own safety.”