Hollywood Dead (Sandman Slim 10)

“Oh yeah? Well, good for you. Why is he here?”

“I kind of kidnapped him from Wormwood.”

“And you brought him to us? What the hell for?”

I go over to him.

“I need someplace to stash him while I figure some things out.”

“No.” Kasabian shoves me and sticks a finger in my face. “Just no. You and the corpse fucker can get your asses right the fuck out.”

“Listen to me—”

“No,” he says again. “I knew the moment I saw you the other night that you were going to make our lives miserable again.”

“It would just be for a day.”

Kasabian puts his head down on the counter. Finally he says, “If you care about Candy or Max Overdrive or even me, please, take your friend out of here and don’t come back.”

“I’m coming back. I’m going to be alive again soon.”

“Fine,” he shouts, getting back up from the counter. “Then come back when you’re alive and not dragging in trouble with you.”

“You’re overreacting.”

“I’m not. I’m scared. You want to bring Wormwood around here? You stupid prick.”

“They’re never going to know.”

“Yes, they are,” says Howard. “I’m going to tell them.”

We both look at him.

He says, “I’m going to tell them everything about this place. Max Overdrive, is it? That shouldn’t be hard for them to find.”

I walk back and crouch down next to him.

“What makes you think you’ll live that long?”

“Death threats?” he says. “Now I’m definitely going to help you. You’ve made it so enticing.”

“There are worse things than death.”

He smiles at me.

“Damnation? Nice try. That’s the very first provision in my contract with Wormwood. Exemption from damnation. You can’t scare me with Hell.”

“I could just make you wish you were dead. I mean, look at Kasabian.”

He says, “Thanks, man. Bring me in as your worst-case scenario. Fuck you too.”

“I have the black blade. I can cut off your head and keep you alive forever.”

“And how am I supposed to perform your resurrection without a body? No. You don’t scare me, Mr. Stark. You might as well send me back.”

“I’ll kill you before I send you back. If I’m going to die, so are you.”

“And we’re back to death threats, which give me no incentive at all to help you,” he says. “You’re exactly the type of bastard who’d let me do my work and then kill me out of spite.”