The Velvet Promise (Montgomery/Taggert 2)

The words tumbled over themselves trying to escape. Judith told how she had tried again and again for some degree of love in her marriage, yet she had been thwarted at every effort. Nothing she did could loosen the hold Alice Chatworth had over Gavin.

“And your vow?” Helen asked.

“I vowed I would give nothing to him that he did not take. But I freely went to him the night before he came here.” She blushed, thinking of that night of love, Gavin’s hands and lips on her body.

“Judith, do you love him?”

“I don’t know. I hate him, I love him, I despise him, I adore him. I don’t know. He is so big—there is so much of him—that he devours me. I am always aware of him. When he enters a room, he fills it. Even when I hate him the most, when I see him holding another woman or reading a letter from her, I cannot rid myself of him. Is this love?” she asked as she gazed beseechingly up at her mother. “Is it love or merely possession by the devil? He is not kind to me. I’m sure he has no love for me. He has even told me so. The only place he is good to me is—”

“In bed?” Helen smiled.

“Yes,” Judith said and looked away, her cheeks red.

It was several moments before Helen replied. “You ask me of love. Who knows less of it than I? Your father also had such a hold on me. Did you know that one time I saved his life? The night before he had beaten me, and the next morning, as I rode out with him, my eye was black and swollen. We rode alone, away from the escort, and Robert’s horse bolted and threw him. He fell into the swamp along the north edge of one of the estates. The more he moved, the deeper he sank. My whole body ached from his beating, and my first thought was to ride away and let him die. But I couldn’t. Do you know, he laughed at me, called me a fool when I’d saved him?”

She paused a moment. “I tell you this to show you that I understand the way he has a hold on you. So did my husband. I know the power Gavin has over you, for my own marriage was the same. I can’t say it was love, and I can’t say yours is.”

They sat quietly for a moment, both staring at the glowing charcoal.

“And now I rescue my husband as you rescued yours,” Judith said. “Even though yours lived to beat you again, and mine will return to another woman.”

“Yes,” Helen said sadly.

“Did having a child matter?”

Helen considered. “Perhaps if the first ones had lived, but there were three dead, all boys. Then when you came, and you were a girl….” She didn’t finish the sentence.

“Do you think it would have mattered had the first one lived and been a son?” Judith persisted.

“I don’t know. I don’t believe he beat his first wife, who gave him sons. But he was younger then.” She stopped abruptly. “Judith! Are you with child?”

“Yes. Two months gone.”

John jumped to his feet in a clatter of armor and steel sword against stone. “You have ridden all this way and you are with child!” he demanded. He had been so quiet the two women had forgotten his presence. He put his hand to his forehead. “Hanging will be too good for me. Lord Gavin will torture me, as well I deserve when he hears of this.”

Judith was on her feet instantly, gold eyes blazing “And who will tell him? You are sworn to secrecy!”

“How do you plan to keep this a secret?” he asked with heavy sarcasm.

“When it must be known, I plan to be far away from this place.” Her eyes softened. “You wouldn’t tell, would you, John?”

His expression didn’t change. “Don’t try such cajolery on me. Save it for that fish of a man, Walter Demari.”

Helen’s laugh interrupted them. It was good to hear her laugh, a sound too seldom heard in her unhappy life. “It does me good to see you like this, my daughter. I was afraid marriage might tame you and break your spirit.”

Judith wasn’t listening. John had heard too much. She had said too many intimate things in his hearing; now her cheeks were beginning to stain red.

“No,” John said, with a sigh. “It would take more than a mere man to tame this one. Don’t plead more, child. I will say nothing of what I have heard unless you ask me to.”

“Not even to Gavin?”

He gave her a worried look. “I haven’t seen him yet. I would give a great deal to know where he is being held, if he is well.”

“Judith,” Helen said, bringing their attention back to her. “You have yet to tell me why you are here. Did Walter Demari send for you?”

John sat down heavily in the chair. “We are here because the Lady Judith said we must come. She does not listen to reason.”

“There was no other way,” Judith said as she too sat down again. “What have they told you?” she asked her mother.