Eternity (Montgomery/Taggert 17)

Carrie had seen her brothers in various states of undress and had a good idea of how to get Josh’s clothing off of him. She found that she was very good at pulling off shirts and even socks.

By the time they were nude, there was no caressing, there was only lust, pure and simple lust. Frantic lust. A lust both of them had waited a lifetime to relieve.

With his mouth fastened on Carrie’s breast, with his hands on her hips, Josh entered her, making Carrie cry out in alarm at the pain, but the pain didn’t last for long. She had wanted Josh for too long to allow a little pain to get in her way.

Moving with him, as frantic as he was, as greedy and as wanting, Carrie cried out in ecstasy when they at last came together, and Josh buried his face in her neck.

For a long, sweaty moment, they lay wrapped in each other’s arms, their skin feeling as though every nerve ending was alive.

“I never—” Josh began, but Carrie put her finger over his mouth.

“Don’t say that you didn’t mean to,” she whispered. “Whatever you do, don’t apologize to me.”

Smiling, he kissed her fingertips. “I was going to say that I’ve never experienced anything like that before. I’ve never lost control like that before. Lovemaking is an art, but that was…”

“Need?” she whispered.

“Need and something more.” Rolling off of her, he pulled her into his arms, holding her and stroking her hair.

“Josh,” she whispered, but he silenced her with a kiss.

“We have to go back,” he said. “The children are alone, and we’ll have to get up early in the morning to catch—” He broke off as though the words were too painful for him to finish.

She lay in his arms for a few moments more, then moved away from him and began to dress, her torn dress making it difficult for her to pull the pieces together. Josh’s fingers brushed hers away. “Allow me,” he said, and as expertly as any lady’s maid, he dressed her, his hands touching her as much as possible.

When they started walking back to the house, they were silent, but then Josh slipped his hand into hers. Carrie at first tried to pull away from him. How could they do what they had just done, then Josh talk of her leaving in the next breath?

At the house, the children laughed at their torn clothing and the red faces of the adults. The kids were in high spirits after what Carrie had done to their Uncle Hiram. Gleefully, they reported that Hiram had left in a rage and had said some terrible things about Carrie and about his stupid brother who had married someone like Carrie. Flinging her arms around Carrie’s waist, Dallas hugged her and told her she loved her.

Not able to bear the thought of having to leave tomorrow, Carrie ran to the bedroom to change clothes. She almost wished she could leave today instead of tomorrow, almost wished she could get her parting over with.

When she had composed herself again, she went back into the parlor where Josh and Tem were washing dishes.

“We could show you how,” Tem said to Carrie with great sincerity in his voice.

Dallas stood beside Carrie, her little shoulders straight. “I don’t think I want to learn either. I don’t want to be a farmer’s wife. I want to be a great actress.”

That made Carrie laugh and pick the child up. “If you were an actress, you’d have dreadful people for companions,” she said. “And you’d have to travel all the time and you’d never be accepted into the best homes. No, it’s better that you marry some nice man and have babies.”

Dallas made a face. “I should like for men to give me roses.”

“If you marry the right man, he’ll give you roses.”

“If he can afford them,” Josh said angrily, then threw down the dishcloth and left the house.

“Now what did I say?” Carrie moaned. She would have thought that their intimacy would have made them closer, but with Josh it just seemed to make him angry.

Josh disappeared for the rest of the afternoon, and Carrie was left alone with the child

ren. At least he thinks that I can take care of them, she thought. He doesn’t think that I’m going to burn the house down.

In the late afternoon, she and the children sat outside on the porch, where Carrie told them stories about Maine and her brothers. She had every intention of telling them that she was leaving in the morning, but she couldn’t seem to say the words.

An hour after sundown, Josh returned, hugged his children to him and told them to get washed and get into bed, that it was late.

Gloomily, Carrie got out of her chair and looked about her. Now she could smell roses, whereas before she came, the only smell surrounding the house was horse manure. Trying not to think of tomorrow, she went back into the house, and when the children kissed her goodnight, she had to work very hard not to burst into tears.

Dallas was nearly up the ladder when she looked back at her father. “Are you coming to bed soon?”