Feel the Fire (Hotshots 3)

Tucker almost couldn’t breathe and sure as hell couldn’t get the words out to correct Luis. And even if he could find the power of speech, what the fuck was he supposed to say?

Nothing. That was all he could do, so he managed a nod without meeting Luis’s eyes.

“Good, good.” Fred continued talking, explaining the office management structure to Luis and asking about his drive up from the LA area, but Tucker’s ears were ringing too loud to register Luis’s answers. Luis was here, invading the office Tucker had worked out of a good decade plus now, never a problem. Now here Luis was after all these years, looking all grown up and pissed off and way, way too good to ignore. He might not be the same boy anymore, but he was a man, and that was possibly more devastating to Tucker’s sanity.

Tucker had spent almost two decades working around wildfires, first on a line crew, then engine and hotshot outfits, paying his dues before moving into fire management. He’d worked hard on his reputation for being unflappable under pressure. No one wanted a burn boss who startled easily or who couldn’t keep his temper. And after all that time on the front lines of fires, not much scared him anymore. Except maybe Luis and the prospect of needing to work alongside him and pretend that they hadn’t once been everything to each other. And more to the point, Luis had every reason in the world to still be pissed at him, even after all this time. Tucker couldn’t expect him to simply forgive and forget any more than he himself could.

As Fred talked, Luis kept glancing over at Tucker, mouth still twisting like he couldn’t believe his rotten luck. Or maybe like he was expecting to wake up any minute from this bad dream. Lord knew Tucker felt the same way. Wake up, damn it. He had plenty of other stuff to worry about this summer more than Luis’s sudden reappearance.

“So Tucker can show you around the office, introduce you to our support staff, show you where we keep the coffee.” Not even looking at Tucker, Fred nodded like this was a done deal. “He’ll bring you up to speed on our various projects. This is undoubtedly a smaller operation than you’re used to, but we’re family here. Everyone pitches in, and we get the job done, one way or another. You’ll see. I’ve got a good feeling you’re going to fit right in.”

Tucker had the exact opposite feeling. And family or no, he wasn’t exactly eager for their past to become office gossip. These were his work colleagues, people he’d do anything for on a professional level, although personally, he’d always kept to himself and he’d like to keep it that way.

But it wasn’t like he could argue with Fred or volunteer someone else—that would only raise suspicion, start that gossip mill chattering. No, he’d have to face this head-on.

“Yup. I can do that.” There. He sounded normal. Distant yet helpful even.

“I appreciate it.” Luis spoke more to Fred than him, not bothering to glance Tucker’s way until they were in the hall. Together. Alone.

Forget all his usual cool resolve. This was fucking terrifying. Every cell in his body took notice of Luis’s nearness in the narrow space, the way he smelled like an unfamiliar spicy and citrusy aftershave, the way he was too big, nothing at all like Tucker’s memories, tall enough now to glower down at Tucker.

“What the hell, Tucker?” Luis’s voice was low, but the fury there was unmistakable. Yup. Two decades might have passed since they’d last locked eyes, but he was still angry.

Before he could reply, Christine came bustling down the hallway with a cheery “It’s Selma’s birthday today! There’s cake in the break room. Make sure the new guy gets a piece.”

“Sure thing.” Tucker managed a nod her direction before she disappeared into the copy room right next to where they were standing. Goodbye chances of a long conversation he undoubtedly needed to have with Luis. What he wanted to say wasn’t going to happen with an audience. Instead he took a deep breath and forced a hearty tone. “Let’s start your tour there, then. Get you some coffee and cake. Follow me.”

Luis’s eyes narrowed like that was the very last thing he’d like to do. He opened and closed his mouth a few times while he darted his eyes to the copy room, posture tense until finally he exhaled.

“Fine. Lead the way.” His tone was every bit as fake as Tucker’s.

Damn. This was going to be a long-ass day of pretending things were fine. Wait. Long-ass weeks. Luis was here for weeks. And that meant at some point they would have to talk. It was inevitable really, and Tucker was already dreading it with his entire being. Hell, he’d live through the twins’ colicky phase again if it meant avoiding having it out with Luis. But one glance at Luis’s stiff shoulders and tight mouth told him no amount of bargaining with the universe would save him from Luis’s barely controlled anger. Weeks. It was going to be weeks, and he might not survive.