The Girl Who Always Wins (Soulless 13)
I stared at my dad, absorbing those words deeply.
“It’s okay if that’s important to you, if you want to be with a man who can give you those things. Nothing wrong with it at all. I would never fault someone who felt that way.”
“But you wouldn’t have left Mom—”
“Never.” He shook his head. “She wouldn’t have left me either. But we aren’t you. We aren’t his ex-wife. We aren’t anyone else in the world.”
“It feels like you don’t want me to be with Atlas.” I spoke with a quiet voice because I couldn’t believe my father would feel that way.
He shook his head. “Then you misunderstand me. Because we will support whatever decision you make without judgment. I just want you to have the full scope of the situation so you can make the right decision. The last thing I want is for you to leave him and regret it—or worse, stay and regret it. You’re young and children aren’t on your mind right now, but there will come a day when it’s all you care about, and I don’t want that moment to be met with disappointment. That’s all I’m trying to say.”
My arms crossed over my chest, my stomach tightening in discomfort.
“It may not seem this way, but I’m having this conversation with you for his sake as well as yours. Because I don’t want him to go through that again—to be with someone who changes their mind. That abandonment…is scarring.”
“I know…” My eyes watered just thinking about it.
“So, I want you to be sure how you feel about this. Because there’s no going back. Be with him, and you deny yourself that experience, that joy of making a family with the person you love. Understand what you’re giving up before you do it. That’s all I ask.”
I looked away, considering my future, the way things would unfold. “He said he doesn’t want to use a sperm donor. It has to be adoption.”
Mom gave a slight nod in understanding.
That meant I would never waddle around with a baby in my belly. I wouldn’t look at our kids and see ourselves in their appearance. We would apply for a child and hope someone would pick us, that someone would think we were worthy enough to raise the child they didn’t want. It was definitely a different life. “Honestly, I want to be pregnant. I want what you guys have.”
Dad stared, his expression not changing because he didn’t think less of me for saying that.
“But…I really love him.”
Mom’s eyes softened.
“I can picture myself loving adopted children like they’re my own, but I can’t picture myself loving a man the way I love him.”
Dad’s eyes brightened slightly, as if he was pleased with that answer but doing his best to hide it.
Mom didn’t suppress her reaction. She just smiled, beamed, really. “Then it sounds like you have what your father and I have.”
I gave a slight nod. “But in the back of my mind, every problem has a solution. Nothing is impossible, so I think we could help him. I mean, you’re the smartest person I know… We could do this.”
His eyes immediately dropped. “Sweetheart, I’m an oncologist—”
“You’re a doctor. You help people. Help me help him.”
Dad kept his eyes down for a while, rubbing his palms together.
“Dex could help too. We could be a team.”
He lifted his chin and looked at me again. “You can’t base your decision on this hope, Daisy. You need to accept him as he is.”
“And I do. But there’s no reason we can’t try.”
“Again, I don’t deal with reproduction—”
“Neither do I. But the three of us are some of the smartest people in the world. We can figure this out. We have to at least try. It’s not even about Atlas and me being able to have a biological child. It’s about giving this back to him, for him not to feel…broken.”
Mom placed her hand on his knee as she looked at him.
Silently, he stared at her, having a conversation without words.
He turned back to me. “Alright.”
“Thank you,” I blurted. “I know Dex will help too.”
“There’s something you need to consider,” he said. “We may all agree to do what we can, but that doesn’t mean he’ll cooperate. It would put him under emotional duress when he’s already had enough of it.”
“I know, but he’ll do it. He’ll do it for me.”
5
Atlas
My nights were spent with a drink in hand, paperwork in front of me, the TV showing a game I didn’t really care about.
A week had come and gone.
Didn’t hear from Daisy.
At least she did what I asked—and took the time to think it over.
The buzzer to the intercom went off. “Let me up.”
It was her.
I stared at the panel before I hit the button and gave her access to the elevator.
A long moment later, the doors opened, revealing Daisy in jeans and a t-shirt, her long hair over one shoulder, her eyelashes thick, her eyes full of affection.