Wayside School Gets a Little Stranger (Wayside School 3)

“See you later, Miss Mush,” said the voice of Eric Ovens.

“Take care,” said Calvin’s voice.

“Have a nice day,” said Kathy’s voice.

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Chapter 12

Nose

Mr. Gorf locked the door. “I don’t want any more interruptions,” he said.

Very quietly, Leslie slipped a piece of paper out of her desk. Then she felt around for a pencil.

Mr. Gorf returned to the teacher’s desk. He opened the top drawer and took out the class list. It had the names of all the children in the class, their parents’ names, and their parents’ home and work phone numbers.

“Let’s play a game!” he said, speaking in his own, normal,

French-donkey-with-a-sore-throat voice. “The name of the game is Who Am I Now?”

Leslie found a pencil. She held the piece of paper on her lap, where Mr. Gorf couldn’t see it, and wrote HELP in big letters. She had to get it to Louis, the yard teacher.

Mr. Gorf touched the tip of his nose. “Who am I now?” he asked.

It was a girl’s voice, soft and warm, with just a little bit of a giggle in it.

Everyone looked at Rondi.

“Rondi,” said Mr. Gorf. He opened his briefcase and removed a portable phone. He dialed Rondi’s home number.

“Hello, Mommy,” Mr. Gorf said into the phone, using Rondi’s voice. “No, nothing’s wrong. I just called to say I hate you! You’re the worst mommy in the whole world. You’re ugly and you smell bad! It’s not fair! Out of all the mommies in the world, I got stuck with you!”

He hung up the phone.

Rondi sat crying in her chair.

Mr. Gorf touched his nose. “Isn’t this a good game?” he asked, sounding very much like a sick French donkey. “Rondi is crying. And at home, her mother is crying too.” He laughed. “Too bad you won’t ever be able to tell her you’re sorry, Rondi.”

Leslie carefully folded the piece of paper into a paper airplane. There was one open window, next to Sharie’s desk.

Mr. Gorf touched his nose. “Who am I now?” he asked.

Everyone tried not to look at Joe.

Mr. Gorf called Joe’s mother at work. “Hello, Mommy,” he said. “I hate you! I wish you’d go away forever! Then maybe Daddy will marry somebody good this time.”

Leslie knew she’d only have one chance. It would take a perfect throw. She tossed the paper airplane toward the window.

Mr. Gorf saw it. “Hey!” he shouted.

The airplane sailed closer … closer … but then at the last second it made a sudden turn, hit the wall, and landed on the floor.

Mr. Gorf laughed. He picked up the airplane and unfolded it. “Help,” he sneered. “No one can help you now! You took my mommy away from me. And I’m going to take your mommies away from you!”

He touched his nose.

“Who am I now?” he asked.