Breathe You In (Sweet Torment 1)

His grip tightened, yanking my ass off the tree and holding me flush against him. He was so deep, so rigid, that my body smoldered around him.

“My father was in DC all the time,” he rasped, and pounded even harder inside of me. “My mother would leave to see her dealer and end up being gone for days. Every time she left, she locked me in the hall closet with a loaf of bread and a carton of juice.”

He pounded faster, harder. I held on to him, my heart breaking while my body burned. I thought of a six-year-old Roman. Terrified and locked away in a small space. In the dark, alone, not knowing what had happened to his mother or when he would get out.

Everything was coming together, but my brain was struggling. Distracted and consumed by Roman inside of me. Which was likely what he was going for. This way, I couldn’t form questions. Couldn’t think straight.

“I’m here,” I whispered, the only thing that made sense to say.

He held me closer.

Regina was paying for past sins that Roman might never forgive. For now, all I could do was wrap my arms around him, and hold on as hard as I could. Whatever he needed, I’d do.

“I’m here,” I said again. “I won’t leave.”

My body was helpless against his, and a slow, intense release came over me, shuddering through my entire body. He was right behind me. I felt his strong muscles flex and harden and his breathing roughen.

“Amy,” he said on his last thrust. Still inside of me, he leaned back enough to look at my face. Those blazing eyes were boiling black pits. “Don’t bring this up again.”

Chapter Sixteen

Here’s your sweet and sour,” Paige said, handing me a carton of takeout. “I’ve missed you around here.”

Sitting on the couch, I forked my food and nodded. “I’ve missed you too. Have you been keeping crazy hours?”

Paige chomped on a dumpling and nodded. “I can’t tell you how happy I am to be in sweatpants right now,” she said around a mouthful.

Hazel had a late study group tonight, giving Paige and me a chance to catch up about the past week. Between traveling with Roman, playing house with him for a weekend, and the revelation in the woods, I didn’t know where to start.

“Paige, you talked about how Roman’s past gets dug into because he’s running for reelection, right?”

She nodded. “It’s usually worse the first time around. So far this campaign has been pretty smooth. No big skeletons.”

How did I ask Paige about things and keep Roman’s confidence? If Roman’s mother had been an addict, wouldn’t the press have found out? And what about all he had endured? I thought of the one question I’d asked Roman all those weeks ago when he’d proposed this arrangement:

Can something like this really be kept a secret?

I didn’t how much Roman hid, but I did know he hid things well. If there was anything I could to help him, I’d like to know. A small flare of rage simmered low in my gut at the thought of what others might do with facts like those Roman had told me.

“Has there ever been an issue involving his mother?”

She stopped eating and looked at me. “Why do you ask?”

“Because I met her. She’s really nice, but there’s definitely some tension.”

I was treading lightly because, again, I didn’t know how much every

one else knew and how much was concealed. Judging by the look on Paige’s face, she was privy to more than she had previously let on. I sighed and looked at my lap.

“I just don’t want him to hurt. I don’t know what’s going on, don’t know what to ask, and don’t want to push too hard, but, Paige,” I shook my head, “I saw something in his eyes. Something…broken.”

There were so many things in life I wished I could fix. I wished I could have fixed Lauren, helped her before she’d ever had the opportunity to dive as deep as she did with drugs. I wished I could fix my relationship with my parents.

I wished I could fix myself.

But of all the things that were wrong in my little world, I wanted nothing so badly as to fix whatever was currently hurting Roman. There was pain, anger, and mistrust in him, and damn it, I wanted to take that away. I may have failed all the other times, but not this time. Not with him. There had to be something I could do.

“If I just understood…” I mumbled, more to myself than to my friend.