Endlessly (Paranormalcy 3)

"You've come to your senses, that's what. Although stubbornness may be a quality some admire, I find your overabundance of it quite distasteful. You take an enormous amount of leading to reach the correct conclusions. "

"You know what I love? I love being manipulated! It makes me so happy and so willing to do whatever I'm being manipulated into!"

His mouth curved into a puzzled frown.

"It's called sarcasm, you stupid faerie nitwit. " I picked up the nearest object, a froofy pillow with gold thread in intricate swirling patterns, and chucked it at his head. He stared at me, aghast, and I was pleased to see I'd managed to muss his perfect golden hair. "And I'm sick of being manipulated! Jack screwed with my life to try and make me do things, too, and remember what happened? I didn't do it! So don't think that you're making me do anything. You're not. I only do what I decide to. "

Reth stood, fury radiating off him as he walked around the couch to stand right in front of me. "Yes, you decide what to do, you silly little girl. It is your decision, it always has been. All I did was give you the information you didn't trust others to merely tell you. You always have to see things for yourself, so I made sure you saw what needed to be seen. "

"Yeah, your detours in the Dark Court, brilliant. Fine. Whatever. But why haven't you fixed Lend yet?"

"Because when you are happy, you don't do anything! If you are content, the rest of the world and those who need you fall away into the background. And I for one knew that things needed to move. When you can't have what you want, you become focused. I know you well. "

"You don't know anything about me!"

"I know more about you than you understand about yourself! You'll see when you're made whole. That's what this is all about. You cannot see how things will be when you're changed, when you're whole. "

"I don't want to change!"

His slender hands curled into fists. "You don't want to change? Do you have any idea what I've been through for you? Why do you think I keep coming back to that horrid, dirty, decaying world of yours? Because you changed me! It makes me sick to think of how I have shifted away from what I should be!"

I leaned back, terrified of the pure fury

in his face.

He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and releasing all the tension from his facial muscles, returning them back to the mask of perfection. "But this is irrelevant. When I get back to where I am supposed to be, my connection to eternity will be restored and flawless. I will be restored. And you will be connected, too, and we have forever to-"

"Whoa, whoa, stop right there, psycho. I'm not coming with you. "

He got that infuriating smile, that one that all faeries have that says they know more than you ever will and you can't even begin to function on the same plane as them but isn't it cute that you think you have any right to consider yourself a rational creature. It was a condescending head pat in smile form.

"Evelyn," he said, his golden voice trying to pull me in closer. "I love you. You'll understand. You'll want to come with me. "

"No. " I shook my head, trying to keep my voice even. "You don't love me, Reth. You love this idea you have of what I should be. What I am now bugs the crap out of you. " He frowned, but I pressed on. "No, it's true. You don't like anything about me the way I am right now. "

"But that does not matter, because you aren't what you should be. It is not your fault and merely temporary. "

"No. I am what I should be. I'm what I want to be. And I could never be with someone or love someone who didn't love me and accept me for who I am now. Lend does that. He knows me, and he loves me how I am now, and he'll keep loving me no matter how I might change. It's not conditional on my becoming anything else. " It took me a while to figure it out, and I nearly lost him because of it, but I knew that now. And I knew that what I had with Lend was worth more than anything else I had in the world. Or could possibly have in another one.

"But you changed me. I changed because of you. I could feel you, worming your way into my heart and soul, shifting things. You've no idea how aggravating it is to have to adapt to new feelings and thoughts. But of course you have no idea, changeable and temporary as you are. You cannot understand what you could be, what you should be. Your mind cannot even begin to wrap around it. When you understand, you will know, and you will choose to be with me. It won't even be a choice. It is what will be because it must be. It will be who you are. "

I put my hand against his chest where I could see the quivering, still dimming brightness of his soul, rested it there. Something was different about his heart, too. It used to beat so slow, so very, very slow, but now it was racing, a rabbit heart, faster even than mine. I used my hand to push myself back a step. "You're wrong. "

"I am never wrong. "

"See, there you go, wrong again. Now, are you going to take me home and fix my boyfriend, or am I going to have to suck out your soul?"

He reached up and wrapped his hand around mine. "I know from experience you refuse to let in my soul. But, yes, I will fulfill the fourth condition to bind you in this contract. "

He opened a door and we walked into the Paths. His steps were tentative. I thought going to the Faerie Realms would help him, but it seemed like he was getting worse. The darkness seemed more oppressive than usual, so I tried to think of other things. Things I had to look forward to. Lend. Sleeping Lend. Reth fixing sleeping Lend, because. . . why could Reth do it? Oh, of course.

"You are going to be in so much trouble when Cresseda finds out you were the one behind the curse. It was you, wasn't it? When you leaned down and touched his head after we got back-I can't believe I didn't put it together. You did the same thing to the werewolf in the Center. "

Reth had the nerve to laugh, the silver bell sound disappearing into the void around us. "Fortunately for me you have never excelled at observation. "

"Yeah? Observe this. " I snaked my foot out in front of his and caught it around his ankle. He stumbled and nearly fell, and I cackled with laughter. Sure, it was immature, but when trying to get revenge on faeries you couldn't kill, the little things made all the difference.

"I do not understand you," Reth said, his voice edged with annoyance as he straightened.