The clock on the dashboard of the cab shines bright and red with four a.m.
Cap sits in the passenger seat in the front, talking to our poor driver about who the hell knows what, and Thatch and I are stuffed into the back.
We closed the bar down around two, dropped an extremely drunk Evan off at his apartment on the Upper East Side, and now, the cabbie is in the process of getting the rest of us home.
First, me.
Then, Cap.
Before he has to make the long, thirty-minute trek to New Jersey to drop off Thatch.
I glance out the window and watch the streetlights pass us by on a blur, but my phone vibrating in my pocket grabs my attention.
Evan: DUDER. BESTIE NIGHT OF MY LIVES. I LOVE YOU.
I grin and shake my head.
Even though I had a hell of a time getting my head out of my emotional ass, it appears the groom didn’t notice I was only partially present at his bachelor party.
Thank God.
The last thing I wanted to do was ruin his night with my fucking baggage.
Or worse, unload the kind of news that could literally ruin our friendship.
I sigh and run a hand through my hair. I have no idea what Evan will do when he finds out about what happened between Maybe and me. But I know I’m going to have to tell him eventually. Even if she never speaks to me again, I still need to be honest with him.
He deserves that from me.
I tap the screen of my phone and check my emails, but it doesn’t take long before I’m back in my text inbox, scrolling through all of the exchanges between her and me.
Her sassy remarks. Our silly jokes. Our near-daily conversations over the past several weeks. Those dirty sext messages from what feels like forever ago. The Deflower me, please? text she sent me after my visit to the Willises’ floral shop.
It’s all there. A trail of how we evolved from friends to more than friends.
How I went from a man who simply adored her to a man who’s in love with her.
God, it’s hardly been twenty-four hours since I saw her, and already, I miss her.
I know I’m a little drunk and I’m probably not in the right state of mind, but fuck, I just want to talk to her. I just want to see how she’s doing.
My drunken brain in charge, I hit the text box and start to type out a message.
How are you?
How in the fuck do you think she is?
Delete.
I miss you. I wish you’d talk to me.
You sound ridiculous.
Delete.
I’m in love with you.
No way I’m telling her that via a drunken text message.
Delete.
“Whatcha doing, bud?” Thatch’s voice fills my ears, and I glance beside me to find him staring down at my phone, clearly reading what’s on the screen.
“What the hell, dude,” I mutter and quickly slide my phone back into my pocket. “Nosy, much?”
“Wait a minute…” He pauses for a moment. “Did I just see you doing what I think you were doing?”
Cap’s ears perk up, and he turns around to look into the back seat. “What was he doing?”
“Texting little Miss Maybe Willis.” Thatch smirks like a real asshole, and Cap’s eyebrows practically touch his hairline.
“No shit?”
Thatch nods. “Yep. That’s exactly what he was doing. And you wouldn’t believe the things I saw him typing—”
I cut him off with a groan. “Can you just drop it?”
“Nope,” they say simultaneously.
“Drop the shit, bro,” Cap adds. “And for once, tell us the truth when it comes to her.”
Well, fuck. I mean, it’s a little too late to act like nothing is going on.
I might be drunk, and I might regret it in the morning, but I can’t find a reason not to tell them. If anything, I just want to tell someone.
“Fine.” I fold like a deck of cards. “But before you bastards start chiming in with your usual sarcasm bullshit, you need to know things aren’t good between me and Maybe. They’re pretty fucking horrible, actually.”
Both of their faces fall.
“What? Why?” Thatch questions, and for once in his life, even drunk, he manages to appear serious.
Even Cap joins in and flashes concerned eyes my way. “You okay?”
“I’ve been better.” I shrug. “Yeah, I’ve definitely been better.”
It only takes a few more questions from two of my best friends to break the dam.
And before I know it, I just kind of unload it all on them.
I tell them how it all started.
I tell them how shit just kept happening between us.
I tell them about last night.
And I tell them the most important part of it all—I’m in love with her, and she wants nothing to do with me.
By the end, Cap is staring at me with wide, slightly drunk eyes, and Thatch appears to have something in his eye.