Keeping Score

“So, what’s the kids’ deal? You always wait for him at the end of the day. Does he stay with you or something?”

She closed her eyes. “He’s in between foster care right now.”

“Shit,” I muttered.

“He’s in a home for children waiting to be placed with another family. It’s worse than an adoption center. He has no normal. No security. No one. And when he does get placed who knows how long he’ll stay there. He’s already been with three different families.” Her eyes misted and I felt something rip through my chest.

I took a step forward, brushing my hand against her arm.

“He’s a good kid.” I spoke slowly. I wanted her to know how deeply I believed it. How deeply I already believed in this kid.

She nodded, wiping the tear from her cheek. “He is. I love him. I’m not supposed to do that, but I do. I can’t help it. There’s something about him, you know?”

She looked up at me with those big blue eyes. “I do know,” I replied.

What the fuck was happening?

“I’m ready.” Hunter bumped in between us and I took a quick step back.

“Hey, buddy.” I ruffled the top of his head and I heard him giggle. It had taken all week for him to let me get that close. It was my own kind of victory.

“We have to get going,” Julie said it, but I didn’t know if she wanted to let me know or Hunter.

“Right.” I had an owners’ meeting. The playoffs weren’t going to fucking win themselves. There was strategy and personnel to discuss with management. It was one of the pros or cons of being the quarterback. I had team and administrative roles whether I liked it or not.

“Good night, Hawk.”

Julie guided Hunter out the door toward the parking lot.

My first response was to follow her ass as she sashayed on those high heels. But as they walked farther away and I saw Julie lean down to say something to Hunter. I wanted to run up behind them and wrap my arms around their shoulders. It was in that moment I knew I was in way over my head.

Twelve

Julie

I could barely concentrate on the road. Hunter was buckled in the backseat and I needed to get him to the home before I had to explain why we were late. And why was that? Because I was falling for a notorious playboy? I was too busy flirting to be punctual?

I sighed, turning onto the dark street where I had to drop off Hunter. It was always the hardest part of my day. The worst. The saddest. The most heart-wrenching.

I put the car in park and walked around to Hunter’s side, lugging his school bag out for him.

“Ready?” I asked with a smile on my face.

He nodded. “I guess.” The happiness he had earlier was gone. He hated this part of the day too.

I wished things were different. I wished I had a way to adopt him. But I had been down that road. I couldn’t make it happen. With my salary there was no way I could afford the legal expense.

“I’ll pick you up for school in the morning, ok?”

I watched him walk up the stairs.

He didn’t answer and I felt the pain in my ribs. I wanted to drag him back to the car and take him home. Tuck him into a soft warm bed. Read him stories. Try to build Lego towers with him. Argue over what was going to happen in the next Star Wars movie. But I couldn’t do any of those things. Instead I was a single twenty-six year old woman who could barely pay her bills.

I had been so desperate I took that stupid job at Catch. I didn’t even have that anymore.

“Good night,” I called after Hunter.

He looked at me over his shoulder and my heart broke a little more.