The Truth Within (Pelican Bay 3)

Yes.

“No,” I said. “It’s fine,” I added. I stepped ahead of him and hurried down the path. There were lights around Gentry’s enclosure that lit up when we walked by. None of the other pens had motion-activated lights because it would have disturbed the nocturnal creatures. So I figured Gentry’s enclosure was different because the attack on him had taken place at night. I didn’t see the grizzly anywhere in the enclosure, but I knew there were several spots where the animal could be hiding. His habitat had multiple groves of trees in it that would conceal his big body. He also had access to a heated building if he chose to go in there. But I’d overheard Dallas and Sawyer talking once about how Gentry refused to enter the building, especially at night, since that was where Jimmy and his friends had confined the animal so they could terrorize him with a pellet gun and cattle prods.

I felt like I was going to be sick as I practically ran past the enclosure. I appreciated that Sawyer didn’t try to distract me with conversation as we made our way to the small animal building.

“This is beautiful, Ford,” Sawyer said once we entered the building and we saw my mural.

“Thank you,” I said.

“Still haven’t named it, huh?” he said.

“No… I’m having trouble with it,” I admitted.

“It’ll come to you,” Sawyer said. He led me to the little door where we could access the rabbit habitat and quickly caught the little rabbit. He handled the animal with gloves and a towel.

“Put those on,” he said as he motioned to a second pair of gloves on a shelf just outside the habitat. I did as he said and managed not to freak when he put the squirmy little bunny into my hands. I could feel the animal’s frantic heartbeat even through the towel and my gloves.

I didn’t know what to say or do, but Sawyer took care of that himself when he began crooning to the rabbit as he quickly checked a bandage on its leg. I was shocked when it seemed like the rabbit’s heartbeat and breathing slowed just a little bit.

I didn’t speak or move for fear of terrifying the animal all over again. Instead, I watched Sawyer as he worked. His moves were quick and expert, but his touch was gentle and he never stopped speaking to the animal. He talked about the most ridiculous things including how much “fucking like bunnies” the critter was going to do when he was released back into the wild. When he let out the swear word, he actually looked at me. “Sorry,” he said to me, even as he kept his voice low and quiet.

“No, don’t be,” I whispered. “It doesn’t bother me.”

“My ex hated it when I swore. I finally managed to break myself of the habit but nowadays it’s come back with a vengeance. But I still find myself looking around afterwards to make sure he didn’t hear me.” His words hurt to hear, but his voice never changed in its inflection. I remembered the day he’d sworn outside while he’d been with me and Cam a few weeks earlier. He’d made a joke about being glad Newt hadn’t been around to hear him or it would have cost him a manicure, but I couldn’t help but wonder if it wasn’t something else he’d been worried about.

“Hard to break free of bad habits,” I said. God knew I had my own.

Sawyer chuckled. “I’d call it a bad habit but it’s more of a lifestyle, I guess. I got so used to swearing as a kid that it just became a natural part of my vocabulary. I mean, I could curb it in school and stuff, but when I was just chilling or hanging out with friends or whatever, it was just my natural way of talking… my parents used to swear a lot – my brothers too. We weren’t exactly the Cleavers.”

I laughed softly.

“That’s who I used to compare my family to,” I said. The rabbit had calmed considerably in my arms so I didn’t feel the need to stay silent, especially since Sawyer seemed so willing to open up to me. “I never really liked that show but it’s one of my mom’s favorites. I got her the DVD collection a couple years back when it was harder and harder to find in reruns but she said I was a fool for spending money on something so frivolous.”

“She watch them?” Sawyer asked.

“Every night,” I said. “To this day.”

“My family was more like those blue-collar, white-trash comedies, except there were never any big I love you and we’ll always be a family moments.” Sawyer was quiet for a moment as he rewrapped the bunny’s leg. “So you didn’t like Leave it to Beaver… what shows did you like?”