Mastered by Mavericks (Doms of Destiny, Colorado 3)

“You seem to be a twenty-four-seven cop. Why so serious all the time? Do you ever do anything fun, Nicole?”

Nicole, not Chicago, this time? God, why couldn’t she seem to keep her head straight around Reed or his brother? And when both were present? Forget about it. “Tell me about your sister,” she said, hoping the change in subject would keep the topic off of her.

Reed smiled and took her hand and squeezed. “Sawyer told you about Erica?”

She nodded. “Is she like you or him?”

“A bit of both, but she’s more like our mom actually.” His face darkened but he didn’t release his hold of her hand.

Reed evidently carried a lot of grief still, even though it had been quite a while since the tragedy. Sawyer had told her about losing their parents in a plane crash. She shouldn’t have brought up family to Reed. Always putting your foot in your mouth, Nicole, aren’t you? “Sorry, cowboy. My badge isn’t on. It’s off. Tell me about the club in Destiny. You guys are members?”

“We are.” The tight lines that had appeared on his face a moment ago softened. “What do you know about BDSM, Chicago? You’ve got more than a couple of clubs there that cater to the life, right?”

“I know very little, though I have heard of the clubs you’re talking about. Quite racy.”

“Do you want to know about the life?” His question seemed to hold a challenge.

What was the correct answer he wanted from her? She wasn’t sure, but felt like there were more wrong ones than right. “I do. Please, fill me in. I want to know more.”

He released her hand and leaned back in the chair, looking out at the vista in front of them. “‘Want’ is a powerful word, sweetheart. I want a lot of things, too, but I’ve learned that most of those will never be.”

“That sounds so sad, Reed. I didn’t take you for a pessimist.”

“Realist.” The hard edge in his tone flattened her.

She wished Sawyer were here now. He had the intuition she lacked. He would know how to handle Reed to get him back to the playful, mischievous cowboy she’d known of him so far. But Sawyer wasn’t here. Reed was. She felt empathy for him. On the outside, she’d chosen to be closed off by retreating from the world to block her pain. Reed had clearly built his walls differently. His were made of lightheartedness, playfulness, and wicked flirtation. Not a retreat at all but a full-on frontal assault which worked the same to keep people from the real truth—that he carried his suffering every second of every day like her. He seemed open, but he was obviously as closed as she was.

“I’m sorry, Reed. Let’s talk about something else. BDSM and the plane crash can be off-limits, okay?”

“No. They’re on the table. What do you want to know about the plane crash?” His lips thinned into a sharp line.

“I can’t even imagine what you went through when that happened.” Her heart was breaking seeing the pain on his face. “I shouldn’t have brought it up. Sawyer told me a little, but that’s his version to tell. I don’t need to know anything. I swear. Tell me about the mountain lion or anything else you want to talk about. Or we don’t have to talk at all. Let’s just wait until Sawyer gets back. Okay?”

He touched her cheek. “Shh, Chicago. It’s okay. Erica and Sawyer have told me I should talk about it more, but I’ve never had a reason to—”

“That’s why I shouldn’t have brought it up, Reed.” Tears of understanding brimmed in her eyes. Talking about his loss reminded her of her own and of her grandfather. She knew what it meant to lose someone you loved, someone you counted on, someone you failed. She hadn’t been able to talk to anyone about her pain either. Though she admired his courage to delve so deep, this was getting too close to her own dark grief. She shouldn’t push this. “Change of subject is in order.”

He frowned. “You interrupted me, sweetheart, before I finished my sentence.”

“I’m sorry, Reed.”

“You keep saying that. Stop. Okay?”

She nodded.

“Damn, you’re something else, Chicago. Destiny isn’t quite ready for you I’m betting.” His lips curled into a slight smile, but the pain on his face remained. “What I was going to say was I’ve never had a reason to talk about my parents’ accident until you showed up.”

She felt her eyes widen in surprise. “What do you mean? I’m not anyone special.”

“You calling me a liar?”

“God, no.”

“Then don’t doubt me when I say this is the first time I’ve ever wanted to talk about this with anyone. You’re special”

“I won’t, but I’m not sure about how you see me.” She’d ventured into this and wasn’t going to back out now.

“That’s better.” He took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I was fifteen when it happened. Not really a boy anymore but not quite a man either. Mom was so excited that the Stones and Knights had included them on the vacation trip to Barbados. So were our dads. They were ranch hands, like Sawyer and me. They lived a simple life but a loving life. The Stones and Knights had always treated them as equals, though that was clearly not the case monetarily speaking. I suppose it had, as it does now, something to do with how Destiny ticks. We’re quirky but loyal folk.”