Sloth (Sinful Secrets 1)

I don’t know whose mouth finds whose... but our lips, our tongues are mingling. I stroke her velvet cheek and tangle with her tongue and clutch her head and pull her closer. I can smell her breath, it smells like peppermint. Her tiny fingers play at my nape. I deepen the kiss. I’m damp with sweat, my eyes are wet... I can’t stop. Can’t stop kissing her. She can’t stop kissing me. I’m dizzy.

My mouth closes over hers. I breathe her breath. Warm breath until my head stops spinning.

Still spinning.

I let my breath out.

“Baby...” Tender fingers find my cheeks. Her eyes. I love her eyes. Her brows pull down, as if she’s sad. Her thumb traces under my eyes. “You had a bad dream?”

“Yeah.” I lean my cheek against her hand.

I feel her hand behind my shoulder, rubbing my back.

It makes me think of Lyon. I like the pain.

Being here... I want to feel it.

I try to remember what she just asked, and what I said. The Dilaudid is making me fuzzy.

I lean away from her. Her face is blurry. I can only see her silhouette, a dark blot on the blue-tinged room. The blue is coming from the window. Curtain drawn. The city lights. I remember those cold lights.

I look down at my chest. Only one IV working right now.

“Is there anything I can do?” she whispers.

“I’ve gotta get up.”

She nods. “I brought you a bunch of longue clothes but they’re in the dryer right now. Our nurse is going to bring them. Until then, I got you this.”

Our nurse...

She slides down off the bed and gets back up with something. I can’t see it.

I blink. It’s a robe.

I push toward the bed’s edge with sore arms.

“Here—” She’s standing by the bed. “Slide down and you can hold onto me.”

I get down, and my legs and hips ache so much I feel tears burn my eyes. I can’t believe I’m back here. My throat is so full, I can barely breathe. Cleo’s arm comes around me.

She kisses me. She wraps her hand around the IV pole. She walks me to the bathroom, pointing out a giant, blow-up palm tree.

“There’s more of that type stuff coming to decorate your room. Hope you don’t mind.” Her voice is static.

She pushes the bathroom door open. Light spills out. I look down at myself. These scrubs. They came untied... are sagging. Fuck.

She leaves me and I stare at the sink. The toilet.

Memories...

I piss, then try to squeeze one out. I think of Cleo, and I get a halfie, even though I’m numb as hell. Okay.

I look in the mirror. That’s a big mistake. My face is bruised. My lips are dry. My eyes look desperate and strung out.

I put on the robe. I don’t know how it got in here. Did Cleo hand it to me? I’m shaking. The longer I stand up... the more things hurt.

I open the door, fast because I’m scared that she’ll be gone. She’s right there. We go to the bed. I lie down across it, on my side. My legs hang off. The robe is soft. It covers me. Good.