Head Over Feels

“I trust you, Tealey.” She picks up the pen and signs. When she sets it back on the desk, she stands, gripping her bag to her body. “Deacon is allowing me to visit my mom this weekend with the kids.” Her voice is so soft that I stand and lean in closer to hear. “It will give us a few days to plan.”

“That’s good. All the pieces need to be in place. Mr. Wellington will make this divorce happen on your behalf. I just know it.” She looks relieved.

“Thank you for everything. I’m just so grateful.”

We wrap our arms around each other, and before she leaves, she says, “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“I’m here when you need me.”

She nods before lowering her head and quietly leaving the center. I flop into my chair and drop my head into my hands. She’s one of so many, and the realization that I can’t help everyone in need overwhelms me some days.

I’m more tired than usual today from the late night, but my heart still hurts. Taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly, I regain my composure, take a sip of coffee, and then return to the front to assist the next person.

It’s a steady stream of clients all morning. By lunch, I’m operating on coffee and a countdown to the end of the day. I’m about to sneak eat a package of crackers I store in my desk when I hear Peggy’s voice from the other side of the cubicle. “How’s the sexy roommate?”

I’m laughing too hard to reply to Peggy right away. It’s not the first time I’ve heard someone call Rad sexy. It happens practically every time we’re at restaurants or in bars, the beach, and at parties. Okay, it pretty much happens anywhere that man goes. But the roommate part is what sends me into a teenage fit of giggles because yeah, that incredible man is my soon-to-be roomie.

“Wait, how do you know?”

She says, “A certain smooth-talker called to tell you the key is being made and will be delivered later. Since you were busy, I took it upon myself to satisfy my curiosity.”

I’d roll my eyes, but she cracks me up too much to be annoyed, so I find myself smiling instead. “Ah, I see.” I lean against the feeble cubicle wall and peek over. “I assume the door is locked?”

“Yes.”

“Well then, officially,” I say to Peggy, “I move in on Saturday.”

“And unofficially?”

“Tonight.” I giggle again, my grip tightening on the top rail of the barrier. Peggy’s not only a great resource for me but she has also become a friend.

She rocks back in her chair, smiling up at me. “I read all about him in that Manhattan Movers and Shakers column last weekend online. Full-spread article with photos. What a hunk. I know you’re friends, but I didn’t realize how good of friends you were to be shacking up together. Tell me something, Tealey. How are you going to sleep, knowing that man is just mere feet from your bed?”

“Like a baby,” I say, pretending to doze off. But my lids open, and I lean down so no one else can hear me except her. “I’ve tested the bed. It’s luxurious.”

“Tested, huh?” She’s all ears, interest piqued. She turned sixty when we celebrated that time, but I have a hunch she’s been the same age for at least five or more years now. She always says she wished she’d settled down and had a family, but her life was too big back then. She modeled in Europe, worked at the Macy’s downtown, and then turned to social work. Now she says she lives vicariously through me. She’s incredible, and selfishly sad for me, she’s retiring this year.

Resting her chin in her hands, she’s eager for more details.

Bursting out laughing, I roll my eyes. “I’ve laid on the bed. By myself.” I throw my arms up. “Just to get a feel for it.”

“Was he with you when you got a feel for it?”

“You’re so naughty, Peggy,” I say, still laughing. “And we’re not shacking up together. We’re sharing a very large apartment. We could pass each other in the night and not notice. That’s how big it is.”

“Since you brought up how big it is . . . you’re stronger than me, sweetheart. There’s no way I could live with him.” Grabbing a stack of papers, she taps them on her desktop and then lowers her voice. “It’s been too long since my vagina’s seen the light of day.”

“I can’t speak to you, but if it makes you feel better, I’m in the same boat.”

“All I can say is buy extra batteries then. You’re going to need them.”

With a goofy grin, I push off the small wall as images of Rad talking to Peggy swirl in my head. I wish I could have heard that play out. As soon as I sit down, she looks over.