Innocent in the Ivory Tower
He gave her that cynical smile she’d seen him use on other people. But it didn’t work on her. She knew him—or was coming to understand him. She loved him, and he was running scared from it. His past was so bleak he couldn’t even recognise what was staring him in the face, but he sensed it, and it had him on the run.
‘No, you’re my boyfriend.’
That wiped the smile off his face. And there it was. The stretch between what she needed from him and what he was willing to offer.
She attempted to deflect his predictable reaction. ‘Don’t look so worried, Alexei. I know today’s hard for you and I haven’t made it any easier. But you could have confided in me just a little. I mean, who would I tell? Kostya?’
He cleared his throat. ‘I didn’t mean to isolate you.’
‘You haven’t. It’s been nice, just the three of us, but I understand it’s not enough for you, and I like your friends—or what I’ve seen of them. Ivanka has been very kind to me.’
‘What’s not enough for me?’ Alexei zeroed in on the one thing she’d hoped would get lost in her rush of words.
‘The three of us.’ She swallowed. ‘Me.’ She hurried on. ‘I didn’t realise until today how different your life must have been before us. Leo and Anais lived very quietly at home. I didn’t see this side of things. I mean, there were famous people on this boat, Alexei.’
Alexei’s expression softened, some of the tension leaving him. ‘They’re just people, Maisy, and not particularly interesting for all their fame or money.’
‘“A crowd” you called them. Why do you invite them?’
‘Honestly, Maisy, after today I’ve got no idea. What a disaster.’
‘I’m sorry I wrecked everything. You didn’t need to empty the boat.’
‘You didn’t wreck anything,’ he asserted in a driven undertone. ‘I was a damned fool, dragging you along to this. I had an insane notion I could keep everything as it was, but that’s impossible. You don’t fit into this life, Maisy. You never did. And I’m sorry you had such a lousy day. I take full responsibility for it.’
Maisy stared at him, trying to make sense of what he was saying above the roaring in her head. What did he mean she didn’t fit into his life? Okay, she needed to get over this. She needed to put him first right now. Ignore the panic scrambling for a grip in her head and just focus. She’d been doing a good job of it. Dropping the ball now would be disastrous.
‘I made an idiot of myself without any help from you, Alexei.’
‘Nobody thinks you’re an idiot, Maisy.’ He closed the space between them and did what she had been wanting him to do all day. He framed her face, bent and kissed her. Gently, sweetly, far too briefly. ‘I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.’
Tomorrow. The future they didn’t have.
She caught at his hand as he moved to step away. ‘Where are you going?’
‘You need clothes, dushka, and we need to get going. I’ve got guests, remember?’
Maisy flushed. Not we’ve got guests, just him. His guests. And she was holding him up.
‘Maisy?’ He captured her face between his big hands. ‘This isn’t about you. It’s my problem. Okay?’
‘No, Alexei, it’s about us.’ She pulled away from him. ‘But I can say it till I’m blue in the face. You don’t want it to be us. You’re happier on your own. Go on, let me get dressed. We’ve got a long evening ahead and I’m not very happy with you right now.’
Alexei had the grace to lower his head. He looked about wiped out, Maisy realised, but he was right. He was a big boy. She had wounds to lick. He could look after himself.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
WHILST Maisy dressed Alexei returned to the boardroom to make a call in privacy to Valery at the house. He hadn’t been in here since that dreary day when they had all gathered aboard Firebird to discuss Kostya. It felt like a lifetime ago.
Bursting into Lantern Square had changed his life irrevocably and there was no going back. He wouldn’t want to go back. Maisy had changed everything.
You’re my boyfriend. Those three words had summed up her simple, uncomplicated assessment of their relationship.
And, God help him, he’d been behaving like a boyfriend from day one in that park in Ravello, when she had snapped and crackled at him and, like the sucker he had never been, he’d followed her—tame as an alley cat offered food and a lap for the first time.
He’d convinced himself it would be casual sex to scratch the itch, but from the moment he’d seen her in his shirt, clear-eyed and standing up to him, casual had gone out of the window.