In Silence She Screams (Midnight Mayhem 3)

He’s upside down and my neck starts to hurt, so I force my face back down until I’m focused on Killian again. There has to be more to him, especially to catch the attention of Saskia Dragavei. My wild dragon. But also because we share blood.

“Lie down.” Killian points to the end of the sofa and I follow instructions, lying back. “What’s the last thing you remember around the blank area?”

I close my eyes as fingers press against my temple. “I-I don’t. I think I was in my room…”

It was dark there. Black. Damp. Dark and cold. I shivered, opening my eyes. They’re heavier, as if they’d been closed for too long. Stabbing. Pain sliced through my lower abdomen. I shifted—well, at least I tried to, but I couldn’t move. Paralyzed by the pain, I let out a loud scream.

I arch off the couch, a bloodcurdling scream matching the one inside my head tearing out of my mouth. “I can’t. Ky…” I call out before my mind is being sucked back into the dark vortex of memories.

“Sit still, Lilith. We’re almost done.”

“Wha—what are you doing?” I asked, my eyes frantically flying around the room. “How did I get here?” Doc stopped at the end of the bed, near my legs. There was a white sheet covering my thighs, a single light hanging from above my bed. She looked at me from over my legs, which were strapped in stirrups.

“This is going to be a lot more painful than even you can endure if you don’t stop moving.”

“What are you doing?” I repeated around a sleepy tongue.

“Just a few more minutes and it’ll be done.”

“You’re a bitch.”

“I know, but I’m also your mother. Which I don’t mind telling you right now, since you won’t remember anything.” I kept my eyes trained on the ceiling. I was in the godforsaken cell again.

“I knew that.”

“Oh?” she murmured. “What gave it away?”

I didn’t blink. “Your cold heart.”

She began removing her surgical gloves, as tears streamed down my face. I never cried. I vowed to myself to never cry again after that moment. Never. Again. I allowed the salted tears to dry against my cheek. “We’re done.”

The pain drummed into me with such force that it beat me numb. I tried to wiggle my toes to check—nothing.

“What did you do…” My voice came out as a whisper, even though the word swam around in my mind. For a second, I wanted to believe they wouldn’t do this. Not this. But should I be surprised… Murder, slavery, sex, human trafficking, and—

“—I made sure you can’t reproduce. It’s called a vaginal hysterectomy.” Her words blanked out.

I launch up from the sofa, clutching my stomach as if the pain I felt just moments ago crippled me into this moment. Arms are around me on both sides, but I shove them off me. “They—” I drop my head onto my knees, wrapping my arms around my legs and squeezing my eyes closed. “They removed everything.” It leaves my lips a whisper, despite the scream inside my head.

Eli’s hand is around my knee, but I flinch away from him. I’m not angry at him. I know that my feelings are unreasonable right now, but after feeling nothing all of my life, I suddenly feel everything and it’s too much. Too much pain, anger, sadness.

Killian leans back in his chair, his legs spread wide. He looks over his shoulder at Kyrin’s mom. “I wonder—”

“—yes,” I seethe, being sure to stay away from Kyrin. How could he fucking put me back there? Even if he did think that was something I wanted, how could he possibly think that, knowing what Patience does? I can never forgive him. I know that right here and now. “I know the Doc was my mother, though I suspected it all of my life. What I didn’t know was that she was obviously from Kiznitch.”

Kyrin’s mom’s eyes come to mine. She slowly starts walking toward me, though Kyrin’s father’s hand is on her arm, stopping her as quickly as she moves. She shoves herself out of his grip, picking up her pace.

“Get up.” When she speaks, her tone is softer than what is expected.

Killian shuffles out of his chair as she slowly lowers herself down, taking his spot.

“I need a drink.” She leans forward and takes the bottle off Kyrin, who still hasn’t moved beside me. Thankfully, he hasn’t tried to touch me either. He might end up with a fist in his eye. Even as my unrelenting anger pulses through my veins, I already feel the veil of calmness that just having him beside me creates. I hate him for it, but more viciously, I hate myself for it.

Khloe rests the bottle of whiskey on her upper thigh, her long fingers tapping against the glass bottle. “Your mother and I were best friends once. She was a specific kind of crazy that you either loved or you hated. It really depended on you more than it did her.”