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Nightwolf

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Fuck. Now I feel like crying. “She’s never going to forget you, Amethyst. Never. Just as you’ll never forget her.”

I watch her face closely until she seems to believe me. Then I hold out the urn and tip it over.

The ashes fall into the waves, though some are scattered into the wind and carried high in the sky. We watch as they float into the cliffsides and Amethyst lets out a beautiful laugh, clapping her hands together.

“Okay, well she’ll be in the ocean, and she’ll be in the flowers too.”

I like the idea of that. We turn around to face the waves, watching the ashes disappear into sunlight and seafoam and I say a quick prayer for my mother and my father, hoping that they’re with Yvonne, that they’re happy, that they know I’m okay and I’ve finally found the love I’ve been searching for.

A few moments pass, the both of us lost in our own prayers and hopes and wishes and love and loss. The sun is gone, but the moon is rising elsewhere, the waves keep coming, and everything is a cycle.

Amethyst sniffs again, wiping her nose on a tissue she brings out from her pocket.

“She’ll always be looking after the two of us,” I whisper to her, putting my arm around her shoulders and squeezing her tight, feeling both sorrow and love at the same time, as I often do now.

Amethyst stiffens for a moment, then cranes her head back to look at me, the dark golden light making her purple eyes look like a supernova. A small, curious smile forms on her lips. “You mean, the three of us,” she says softly.

I frown, not understanding.

“She’ll be looking after the three of us,” she says again.

I must be fucking dumb because I still don’t know what she’s saying.

That is, until she takes my other hand and places it on her stomach and holds it there with reverence.

Holy shit.

My mouth drops open.

This can’t be.

“What?” I cry out. “Amethyst, what are you talking about?”

She’s grinning at me, beaming actually. “I’m pregnant.”

“That’s not possible,” I tell her, wondering if this is a cruel joke because it would be the cruelest of them all. “You can’t…”

“Says who?” she says, her brow raised in challenge.

“Says…says the way things are? Since humans turned into vampires can’t. That’s just the way it is.”

“Well, I guess it’s not the way anymore, is it? Not until I came along.” I’m still staring at her in utter disbelief, too afraid to let myself believe it, to feel it. She frowns. “Please tell me this is a good surprise.”

I just shake my head, even though it’s the best surprise I’ve ever had. “I don’t know what to say, I don’t. I mean, you’re getting my hopes up, you know, and if this is some sick joke…”

She squeezes my hand that’s over her belly, biting her lip as she shakes her head. “Not a joke, Wolf. I missed my period. I’ve taken five pregnancy tests over the last three days. All of them say I’m pregnant. I’d go to a doctor to confirm, but I think I’ll have to find a vampire one since I have no idea what else they’ll find in my blood. But, yeah, until then, I think this is a thing. I’m pregnant. I’m going to have your baby.”

One moment I’m standing up, the next I’m dropping the urn and falling to my knees, sinking into the sand. I grab hold of her, place my head on her stomach, and I cry. I let it all out, all the grief I’d been holding, then all the happiness that’s bursting inside me.

“Baby,” I whisper to her stomach. “You’re our baby.”

Amethyst runs her hands through my hair, and I just hold her as tight as I can without hurting her. “If it’s a girl, can we call her Yvonne?” Amethyst whispers after a moment.

I laugh, even though I’m crying. “Of course. Of course, it’s perfect. It’s a beautiful name.”

“And if it’s a boy,” she says, “can we name him after your father?”

I still, my heart dangerously close to a meltdown. I move my head to stare up into her eyes, the stars coming out in the sky behind her. “Yes. Yes. Leif. His name was Leif.”

“It’s settled then.” She grins, so beautiful, her smile like starshine. “Leif or Yvonne. It’s perfect.”

“You’re perfect,” I say to Amethyst, my love for her swelling in my chest until I think I might die from it. Then I press my mouth against her belly. “And you’re perfect too, little one.”

I wish my parents were here. I wish Amethyst’s mother were here.

But I know they’ll now get to live on.

The cycle continues.

And the loss leads to love.

* * *

THE END



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