Bound By Blood Anthology (The Camorra Chronicles 7.50)

“But I might not be able to do everything. I have to be mindful of what my pregnancy allows. I’ll read up on it so I’ll know what I can’t do.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll give you alternative yoga exercises in case it’s necessary or you don’t feel comfortable,” I said, touching her leg.

Uncertainty crossed Lily’s face. “Are you sure you want to do that?”

It sounded like “are you sure you can do it?” to me, but I pushed my annoyance down. “Pregnancy adapted workouts were part of my training. Trust me, I can make sure you and your kid are safe.” It wasn’t even a lie. Knowing that many mob wives popped out one baby after the other, I’d made sure to be versed in the special needs of pregnant women or women recovering from birth. I didn’t mention that I’d read up on the matter again to make sure I kept the secret passenger in my belly safe until its delivery to Aria and Luca. For a moment, I considered telling Lily. But Lily, far more than Aria, had completely lost herself in being a mom. Sometimes it seemed there was hardly any room for anything else anymore. It was something that I’d always considered the most deterrent thing about becoming a mother—losing yourself and everything you used to be, as if by giving birth you lost every right to still have your own needs and interests.

Lily beamed at me. “Thank you!” Then her expression turned sheepish. “I’m sorry if I’m being annoying. I’m just so excited about my pregnancy. I can’t wait for Sara to have siblings.”

My eyes widened. “Siblings? Are you preggers with more than one?”

“Oh no.” Lily giggled, again caressing her flat belly. For some reason the motion made me unreasonably angry, which was completely irrational. “But Romero and I want at least three kids.”

I nodded, smiling tightly. I’d never minded Lily’s exuberance when it came to being a mom but for some reason, I had trouble being around it now that I was pregnant myself. Yet, I was determined not to vent my irrational feelings on Lily. She had every right to be happy and I wouldn’t ruin it.

Matteo and I sat at the bar in our kitchen, drinking coffee and chatting about Matteo’s plans to head out with Growl today to seek out a hiding place of the MC giving them trouble.

“Do you really have to join Growl?” I asked.

Matteo’s eyebrows rose. I wasn’t someone who clucked. I was more like the mother hen who kicked her eggs out of her nest. With Matteo I’d grown used to his thrill-seeking ways. “Are you worried?”

I was, and more than that, I was terrified. Matteo’s life was dangerous and while I’d worried in the past as well, I’d usually kept my feelings to myself, knowing that he could handle things.

I glared in response. Matteo grinned and wrapped an arm around my hip, dragging me closer so he could kiss me. “All these hormones are turning you into a softy.”

It was the first time we’d mentioned the pregnancy since my doctor’s appointment in my seventh week, which was more than four weeks ago. And even on that day our conversation about the pregnancy had only consisted of “Everything okay?” from Matteo and a curt nod from me. We’d kept living our life, minus the club visits and drunk escapades.

“Just be careful,” I pressed out. Matteo searched my eyes as he did so often recently, then nodded. “You know me.”

“I do, which is why I want you to be careful. Don’t leave me alone to deal with this mess.”

Matteo smiled, but there was something dark behind it. “Luca and Aria will deal with the mess, babe.”

I didn’t get the chance to ask what that was supposed to mean because our bell rang. “Aria,” I said, because vigilance had taken over Matteo’s face. “She made another appointment with her OB/GYN today.”

Matteo stood and allowed her to take the elevator up to the penthouse. Aria probably knew the code from Luca but unlike him, she always rang the bell like any decent human being would.

Matteo waited for her with his back to me. Aria smiled hesitantly as she stepped in. “Ready?”

“Sure,” I said. I’d tried to avoid another examination for as long as possible, but Aria had insisted it was time for another checkup now that I was twelve weeks along.

I kissed Matteo and he stroked my back in an almost lingering way. Then I pulled back and followed Aria.

At first, I considered not looking at the ultrasound screen but then curiosity got the better of me. The moment my eyes registered the small baby on the screen, I wished I hadn’t given in. This wasn’t a mere blob anymore. The doc explained what we saw and marked the feet, head, hands… a complete human being in my belly.