Beautifully Destroyed (Beautifully Broken)

It feels like… Ethan’s the other half of my soul.

I can’t lose him as well.

Glancing down at my hands, I close my eyes as my heart cracks a little more.

“Fin?” My gaze darts to Ethan. He takes one look at me then pulls the truck over to the side of the road. “Is it a panic attack?” he asks, turning in his seat and taking hold of my shoulder.

Needing to know, or it will push me over the edge, I ask, “Is it too much for you? We’ve only been dating two weeks.” I shake my head, the panic growing in my chest. “I…”

“No, baby.” He leans closer to me, his eyes locking on mine, a frown on his forehead. “I’m in this with you. For the long haul.”

“But… your work… your life.”

Ethan brings his other hand to my cheek. “You. Are. All. That. Matters.” There’s such intensity in his eyes, it douses the flames of panic licking at my insides. “I meant it when I said I’m falling in love with you. God, I’m already head over heels. Some sick fuck is not going to change how I feel about you.”

“I wish we could have a normal relationship,” I whisper.

No creepy stalker. No rape. Just us, falling in love.

“What do you mean by normal?” he asks, his expression turning tender.

“Just us falling in love.” I shrug. “Dates. Hugging. Kissing.” My bones grow heavy, then the darkness killing me spills over my lips, “Me belonging to you and not him.”

“You do not belong to that fucking bastard!” Ethan snaps, anger exploding from him in an intense wave that presses me back into the seat.

Crap.

He closes his eyes and sucks in a calming breath of air. I watch as the rage retreats, and when he looks at me again, his expression is tender.

“We can have all of that, Fin. When you’re ready. You’re in control of the pace, remember?”

“It’s not the same.” I shake my head. “I want it to be spontaneous.”

“Okay.” He takes another deep breath. “You feel comfortable with me, right?”

I nod quickly.

“And you’re okay if I touch you?”

I nod again.

“If I do anything that makes you uneasy, you’ll tell me?”

I don’t think Ethan can do anything that will trigger my trauma. “I will.”

“Just tell me ‘pause.’ That’s our safe word. You say pause, and I back off. We’ll talk about what I did to trigger you, so I don’t do it again.”

“Okay.”

Ethan’s hand moves to my neck, then he pulls me closer, and his mouth covers mine. A spark zaps through my body, and when his lips caress mine, it grows into tingles spreading over my skin.

Way too soon, he pulls back, leaving me wanting more. Our eyes lock, then a hot grin spreads over his face. I’m glad I’m sitting because I go weak in the knees.

“Ready to be swept off your feet, Fin?”

Letting out a chuckle, I nod. “I am.”

As long as it’s with Ethan, I know I’ll be okay.

ETHAN

After getting a new number for Finlay’s phone, we head home.

“Can I make coffee?” Finlay asks.

“You don’t have to ask, babe. Make yourself at home,” I say as I pull her phone from my pocket. Her eyes drop to my hand, and it has me saying. “I don’t want you to see. Just in case he sent a text. Okay?”

She nods then goes to the kitchen.

I walk down the hallway and glance over my shoulder before turning the device on.

Immediately the texts pop up, one after the other. This time I’m calm enough to think and forward them all to Sheriff Miller’s phone before deleting everything.

I take a screenshot of all the contacts list, which isn’t long. Going into the photo gallery, I forward all the photos to my number so she won’t lose any of them. Most are of David and her.

Turning the phone off, I take out the sim card and put in the new one. When I have everything set up, I head back to the living room.

“You’re good to go. I programmed your contacts in and transferred your photos over.”

Finlay comes closer, eyeing the phone like it’s a snake. “So it’s safe?”

“Yes.” I hold the old sim card between my pointer finger and thumb, then crush it. “No more texts.”

A smile splits over her face, then she takes the phone from me. “Thank you.”

Leaning down, I press a kiss on her forehead. “You’re welcome, baby.”

She lets out a chuckle, then tilts her head back. “I like when you call me that.”

“Baby?”

Her cheeks flush, and those dimples that test my self-control make their appearance. I wrap an arm around her, tugging her against me, then I brush my lips over the one dimple.

Finlay’s breath hits my neck, sending goosebumps over my skin.

Pulling a little back, I lock eyes with her. I shove everything to the back of my mind and just take in how beautiful she is.