Don't Hold Back (Love Hurts 4)

“Anyone would think that you’re the older sister,” she grumbles. “Okay, no more tears, I promise.” She smiles at me, but I can see it’s still worrying her.

“Let’s get going, then,” I say lightly. I kiss Cade on the cheek. “Will you be okay?” I ask, meaning can he handle the day with my dad. I’m only slightly nervous at the idea of leaving the two of them together.

“I’m not going to scare him off,” Dad scoffs. “If he can put up with you, then he can certainly put up with me.”

“Thanks Dad,” I say, rolling my eyes. I grin to myself as I follow Mum and Calli outside.

Did I mention how much I love my family?

We start off our girls’ day by getting manicures and pedicures at a little salon in the city, just down from the hotel. Because every girl wants to look at best when she goes in for major brain surgery, right? As my nail technician puts the final coat of hot pink on my fingernails, it dawns on me that they’re probably going to remove it tomorrow.

Oh well. At least I can look good today.

We walk out feeling girly and pretty, trying to decide where to go next. I suggest a mall, because the less I have to walk today the better. We’ve barely even begun our day and I’m already tired. We arrive at the mall just as Mel calls to say she and Nora are at the hotel.

“Want to come shopping?” I ask her.

“Hell yeah,” she laughs. “I was born to shop.”

We wait at the near the entrance for the girls, perched on a bench seat outside a Chinese massage centre.

“Oh sign me up,” Mum exclaims, making a beeline for one of the vacant chairs. Calli and I roll our eyes at each other, because shopping with Mum is like shopping with a hyperactive toddler. I follow her in and sit down too, mainly because I’m exhausted and I figure a massage can’t hurt.

As soon as they start working the knots out of my neck, I’m in heaven. It’s incredibly soothing and the it’s most relaxed I’ve been in months, not to mention the good it’s doing for my aching head.

“Ez!”

I look up and see Mel and Nora standing there. My masseuse finishes, so I get off my seat and run over to hug them. I nudge my head towards the little Asian man who had been working on me and sigh.

“That guy and his hands…”

I shiver and Mel nods, like she catches my drift.

“You got the special, then?” she asks knowingly.

Nora and I give her a funny look.

She flushes and waves us off. “Never mind.”

I’m still trying to decrypt her comment when Nora pipes up.

“So, what are we doing? Because someone mentioned shopping, so I need to shop. I’ve been sitting on a plane for the last twenty hours and I’m feeling antsy.”

“Fine.” I grin, even though I’m just the opposite and about ready to collapse. “Let’s go shop.” I arrange to meet Mum and Cal at a coffee shop in an hour so I can spend some time with my friends.

We walk around the stores, checking out clothes. I pretend to be interested in some pretty dresses, when in reality I couldn’t care less. All I want to do is sleep, but they’ve come so far to see me, I feel bad for just wanting some me time.

We meet Mum and Cal for lunch. They all eat, but I’m not hungry because my stomach is regurgitating blueberry pancakes. While I wait for them to finish, I text Cade. I wonder how he’s going with Dad. I bite my lip and smile. I wish I could be a fly on that wall.

Me: How are you going?

Cade: Me? Your father is only mildly terrifying. But seriously, we’re fine here. Take your time and enjoy yourself. I miss you.

Me: I miss you too.

I almost type I love you when I stop myself. Neither of us has said it yet. I do love him and I know he loves me, but saying the words means something extra special.

I’ll say it tonight. Just in case I don’t get the chance again. My lip trembles, and just like that, the floodgates open. There I am, sitting in the middle of the food court in a busy London mall, bawling my eyes out, and I just can’t stop.