My Summer in Seoul

“I mean it.” His gaze lingered.

Rae cleared his throat. “We have to go. Thanks for agreeing to this.”

I wasn’t sure if he was speaking English for my benefit, but at the same time, Rae spoke, freaking Lucas was grabbing my wrist and pulling me to my feet and away from Dae-Jung like he was about ready to kidnap me.

I tried pulling away.

His grip was tight. I glanced over my shoulder. “Thanks, Oppa!”

“Any time.” He laughed. “Any time.”

Lucas jerked me into the next room then pinned me against the wall. His chest was heavy against mine as his brown eyes held me captive. He’d clearly had contacts in the first day he glared at me. He didn’t say anything. Maybe he didn’t need to.

His stance was protective, and I had no idea why.

Like he was guarding me from someone or something.

I frowned. “Did I do something—”

He pressed a finger to my lips but then jerked back, pulled completely away, and then did a small circle. He kicked the wall opposite just as Rae appeared. He looked between us, then reached for my elbow and pulled me away from Lucas.

“What the hell were you thinking?”

Tears formed. “I was thinking don’t piss off the famous dude I just picked up since he seemed to be important.”

“Important,” Rae repeated with irritation. His eyes flashed. “He’s not… Just…” He clearly struggled. “Stay away.”

“When was I ever close?”

“Just— ” He sighed, then cursed. “Be careful, okay? You can’t just trust everyone that’s nice to you.”

“Then maybe”—I jerked away from him—“you guys should be nicer.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Life rarely is,” I shot back. “If we’re done here, I need to get the van ready to take you guys home.”

He let me go, his eyes roaming over my body. “It’s not like a K-drama.”

“Pardon?”

“All the guys here. It’s not all gentle kisses, being afraid to hold hands, and cute laughter. Just be careful. You’re a foreigner.”

I wanted to answer, “Exactly! I’m disgusting.” But insecurity was so unattractive, and I didn’t want him to be silent like yuuuup. So I just sighed. “Rae, what do you want?”

He gulped and looked down, then back up. “Honestly?”

“Yes, honestly.”

His swallow was slow; his throat moved like he had a lump in it. “I want SWT to succeed. I want Lucas to stop moping. I want Jay to finally admit who he is to the world. I want Sookie to experience life outside of this chaos. I want Kai to stop blaming Lucas for something that wasn’t his fault. I think I want too much.”

Heart breaking, I reached for his hand. He let me. I squeezed it. “You’re under a lot of pressure. I want to help, but I don’t know how. I know I’m a mess, and I’m trying to keep it together, but you’re carrying too much, and it’s not fair. I just want you to know that you can tell me. I may not have the answer, but I’ll find it, or I’ll find a way to find it. Just… use me, I’m the intern. We’re good at things other than grabbing coffee and driving vans.”

He leaned in, face unreadable. “You’re horrible at both.”

I laughed. “See if I give you any compliments or help ever again.”

“You literally almost killed us.”

“I was scared!”

“I was scared,” he said louder.

I glanced between us, noting that we were still holding hands, and I quickly disconnected.

He stared down at his fingers as though he wasn’t sure what had just happened, then took a step back and cleared his throat. “I’ll try, I promise.”

“Me too,” I promised. “Then again, I have been. I just suck at it.”

He rocked back on his heels. “Why don’t we just chalk it up to culture shock?”

“Still shook,” I grumbled.

“I’m sorry,” he confessed. “For not giving you a chance, for being hard on you.”

I shrugged. “I deserved it.” I looked around the empty hall. “Should we get everyone home so Sookie can eat more chicken?”

“Poor Sookie.”

“Poor me, I have to eat it too.” I hugged my stomach. “One day, I’m ordering you pizza, and you’ll all be sworn to secrecy.”

He barked out a laugh. “Please do.”

We rounded the corner. Lucas was leaning against the wall like he was waiting for us. As we passed, he said something in a low voice to Rae, and from his tone, it sounded really cruel.

Immediately, Rae put distance between us.

Things were tense, back to the way they were a day ago when I drove everyone back to the dorms.

Even during dinner things felt awkward.

I did the dishes just to stay away from the tension, which was something I would never do at my own house even. They were done soon, the guys’ curfew was approaching, and it was eerily quiet.

Exhausted, I made my way to the living room. Rae was in sweats and had a notebook in hand. I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to sit down, so I walked by him. When I made it to my door, he spoke. “You can stay if you want.”