Second Time's the Charm

But then he’d have talked himself out of it. He’d just wanted it to be natural. Nice. A memory she’d cherish in the years to come. Something he’d cherish, too, in the secret recesses of his mind where a guy allowed such things.

“Champagne,” Lillie said, sipping again, more slowly this time. “What’s the occasion?”

He stared at her.

“What?” She smiled. “Did you get a promotion at work already? I’m not surprised. Come on, tell me. You have no reason to be modest.”

“You love my son.”

Her smile faded and she took another sip of her champagne. “I care for him a great deal, yes.”

“And you and I... It’s pretty obvious that we’re...compatible.”

“I... It’s been a long time since I had male companionship,” she said, obviously choosing her words with care. Jon read between the lines. She was hot for him. “I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t enjoying your company. Very much.”

It felt right.

“I want to marry you.”

“What?”

He’d done it wrong. “What I meant to say was, will you marry me?”

She stared at him wide-eyed. Clearly shocked. And something else, too. He couldn’t make it out for sure. Was she scared? “We haven’t even said we love each other.”

She didn’t say, “We don’t love each other.” The difference was subtle, but Jon clung to it.

“Words don’t have to be spoken for feelings to exist,” he said. “But just for the record, I know we said what we had was just physical, and I tried to keep it that way, but I do love you, Lillie. I’m not good at it, yet, but I know I can be. I give you my word that I will be.”

“But...I don’t love you.” A sharp intake of breath followed her words.

Okay. Sipping his champagne, he said, “I’m all right with that. You love my son.”

“But, Jon...”

“Can you honestly say that you don’t care about me?”

“Of course I care about you. I’d never have slept with you otherwise.”

Exactly.

“But we said ‘no commitments.’ No strings attached.”

“Neither of us are ‘no strings attached’ type of people, Lil. We tried. And instead of having a nice romp, we slept together and just kept doing it. The more time we spend together, the more time we seem to want to spend together. Unless I’m getting that wrong.”

“No, you aren’t. I love being with you and Abe, it’s just that...”

She’d used the “L” word. Maybe things would be okay, after all.

“What?” Whatever it was, he could handle it. She had no idea how much he could handle.

But she would find out soon. As soon as she agreed to marry him. Then, when he was certain she cared enough to commit to the long haul, he’d tell her about his past.

“I can’t marry you, Jon.”

“Why not?”

“I can’t marry anyone.”