Worth the Risk (Carolina Rebels 5)

“You aren’t—”

“Call him,” he says for a third time. “I’ll help you. You can accept it as a gift or figure out a way to pay me back, I don’t care, but if you like him and you want him, then call him.”

My heart rams into my ribcage like a bull trying to escape its pen as I stare at him. I know that Elias cares for me, but for him to do this for me? My blood feels light as it flows

through my veins. “We can find someone else,” I say because I have to try one more time.

“Call. Him.”

“You’d let me pay you back?” Hope swells in my chest.

“You can do whatever you want as long as I can help you,” he says with a nod of his head. “And you said that you’d let me help you,” he reminds me.

“Even if it takes me until I’m eighty?”

Elias laughs. “Yeah, Raelynn. Even if it takes you until you’re eighty.”

I don’t know what it is about this moment. What’s so special about him helping me with this? About him letting me paying him back on my own time? But it’s those things and the fact that he’s helping me assure the custody and visitation papers with Henry are exactly the way I want them, which is what will be best for Jackson. And that means more to me than anything else.

Overcome with emotion, I lean over and kiss him right on the mouth. Elias is surprised, but why doesn’t register to me until I pull away and hear Jackson gasp, “Momma! Why are you kissing EJ?”

My cheeks burn with the intensity of hell from embarrassment as I face him. I say the first thing that comes to mind because I have to say something to him. I need to be the one to answer him first, not Elias. “He decided to help me with something really important. I’m grateful and it made me like him even more, so I decided to kiss him real quick.”

Jackson only stares at me like I’ve grown two extra heads.

“She gave me cooties, J-man,” Elias says as he wrinkles his face and looks a little grossed out, breaking the odd tension-like feeling between us.

“My momma doesn’t have cooties!” Jackson defends. He suddenly wraps his arms around my neck and pulls me away from Elias. “You do!” Jackson laughs and says, “Stay away from my momma with your cooties!”

Bree, the poor girl, doesn’t know what’s going on, but she pushes herself up just enough to hug me around the neck too and giggle as she joins in on the fun.

“If I have them, and she just kissed me, then she has them now,” Elias points out.

Jackson seems to think about this for a second before releasing one arm. Next thing I know, he rubs my lips. “Now, they’re gone!” Jackson sticks his tongue out at him. “I wiped them away.”

I laugh. “Okay, baby. Let me go. You’re both pulling on my hair.” Leaning over like this isn’t that fun either.

“What if she wants my cooties?” Elias asks and I toss a glare his way as Jackson releases me and I pull Bree away. Elias ignores me.

“Do you want to kiss EJ and get his cooties, Momma?” Jackson asks, tapping my arm to get my attention back on him.

See? This is why he shouldn’t have asked. This is why I shouldn’t have kissed him to begin with. Elias discreetly pokes my side. All I have to do is answer in a positive way and we don’t have to be so sneaky. There can be some PDA. But is it too soon to introduce something like that to Jackson?

I squeeze my eyes closed and decide to stop thinking. Stop worrying. Stop trying to figure out the present and the future and all the variables in between. I follow in Elias’s footsteps and go with my gut.

With a deep breath, I look at Jackson. “If EJ decides he wants to be my boyfriend, then maybe.” He’s already my boyfriend, but Jackson doesn’t know that yet.

My little boy looks at Elias as if he’s waiting for an answer from him. Bree crawls into Elias’s lap, but I can’t muster the courage to look at him. I see him shift in my peripheral vision, lean closer, and then he kisses my temple.

“I definitely want to be her boyfriend, J-man. Is that okay with you?” Elias’s fingers interlock with mine and I almost cry with him asking Jackson if he’s okay with it.

Jackson nods, though he looks a little unsure. He crawls onto my lap. This feels like a huge moment.

“Do you know what it means for someone to be her boyfriend?” Elias asks. Jackson shakes his head. “There are things your mom’s boyfriend is supposed to do. He’s supposed to be good to her and to you.” Oh lordy. He’s definitely going to make me cry now. “He’s supposed to treat her like she’s one of the most important people in his life and the same goes for you. He’s supposed to try his hardest to never make her cry and if he does, he apologizes, fixes his mistake, and doesn’t let it happen again. Your momma’s boyfriend is supposed to make her even happier than she was. That’s what it all comes down to. He’s supposed to make her really happy, Jackson.”

“You make Momma happy.”

Elias smiles. “I’m doing my best.”