Their New Beginning (Oh Captain, My Captain 5)

“I don’t think there was anything we didn’t talk about that night. I remember thinking you were too good to be true because you seemed so perfect.” His voice drops low. I didn’t know that either.

“That’s funny because I thought the same thing about you. I fell in love with you that night,” I tell him honestly. “I called Regina the next day and told her I’d found my soulmate. Of course, she laughed at me, but I knew. I knew that I loved you and that we would always be together.” I think back to that night, and one memory stands out. “However, the vanilla ice cream may have sealed the deal.” I giggle, remembering him licking it off my body.

He smiles. “It was definitely the ice cream.” He turns on his side and mirrors my position. “Really? That night you knew?”

I nod. “I did. We talked about everything, did everything, and it was the most magical evening I’d ever had. It was all because of you, and I knew that you were the one. That’s why when you asked me to marry you three weeks later, I did. I never had a doubt in my mind. Until–” I trail off.

“Until I stopped acting like your husband and started this domino effect.” His face is sad.

I need to own up to my mistake, and this is a perfect time to tell him everything, because he really can’t leave the room.

“You may not want to hear this, but when he left, all I thought about was how I was the one who let you down. I couldn’t believe I’d ruined everything you and I had built together. I was so selfish, Jax. It’s not your fault we’re in the mess; it’s mine. I can’t blame you for it because I should have been woman enough to tell you what I was feeling and not hiding at the hospital night after night. But, I thought... I thought you stopped loving me and I wasn’t good enough for you anymore.” I shut my eyes.

“That’s why it’s my fault, too though. You’re my wife and the love of my life and I didn’t show you because I was too concerned about my job and how well I played.” I open my eyes at his words. “That bothers me every day, even more so that it took you pointing it out for me to realize it. I don’t know how I could have been too blind to see it. I never thought I would have picked hockey over anyone, especially not over you.”

“Jax, I knew that it was your love and job, but my whole life, I have always been number two. I was the baby, and even though Regina tried, she’s so much older than I am and she didn’t need me. Mom always picked whatever husband she was with at that time. For the first time in my life…” I sigh, feeling the pain of my life washing over me. “You treated me like number one for the longest time and then it stopped. And like all the other times in my life, I was clawing to be number one again. I got tired of it, so I just gave up. I never thought you would hurt me like that. I trusted you that much.”

“I wish you hadn’t just given up,” Jax tells me softly. “It’s over and done with now, though. I’m sorry for hurting you, Avery.”

I take a chance and move closer to him. His whole body tenses. He knows that I’m only wearing a T-shirt and he’s only in boxers.

“Pretend you still trust me,” I beg as he lets me touch his cheek. He doesn’t move, but he watches me lean in. Even though I want to do more, I briefly touch his lips with mine. I love the feel of his soft full lips against mine. When I release him, I roll over to my side of the bed and close my eyes.

~ ~ ~

The next day with Jax’s parents is wonderful. I love his parents, and even though they doubted our relationship at first, they have never treated me differently. I do agree with Jax that Stan is a lazy bum, but he’s family and I’ll keep my mouth quiet.

The game is good. Although the Gamblers lose, Jax’s still holding strong in the number one spot in points.

It was sad to see his parents leave, but I’m a little glad because tonight is our re-creation of date number three. While Jax is working out, I go shopping. I buy a new dress, just like I did five years ago. I put Jax’s black suit out on the bed. He slept in the bed again, and I couldn’t have been more thrilled.

I send him several texts, asking him out and telling him to wear the suit on the bed. I get ready in the guest room, and when he comes home, I hide in the office. I don’t want him to see me. After a little bit, I go out the front door and knock on it again. Just like he did when he came to pick me up on our date.

This date is more special because it’s the first time Jax told me he loved me. I thought he was crazy because it was only our third date. However, he swore he did. I giggle

at the thought now.

I look at my reflection in the front door window. I purchased a short, white chiffon, strapless dress. Jax’s loves when my hair is down, so I kept it in my natural wavy mess. He also hates a lot of makeup, so I kept it light.

When he opens the door, there is a smile on his face. I know that smile, and I've missed it desperately. “Avery.” He looks me over. “You’re gorgeous.”

“You look very sexy in that suit, Mr. Godwin. Now, would you like to enjoy a night out on the town?”

“With you, yes. But hold on,” he holds up one finger, “I forgot my shoes.” He runs over to the couch and puts them on.

“You’ll have to drive. My shoes make it impossible to drive.” I stick out my leg showing my white, very high heels.

“I love your shoes, and I don’t mind driving.”

He holds the door open for me, and we hit the road to his favorite casino. I’ve already hit the bank and gotten money for him. I like the slots because of all the pretty lights, I think. Jax’s a Blackjack guy. He always has been. He valets the car and holds my hand as we walk in. A few heads turn at seeing him because he is well known in Las Vegas, but no one says anything.

After he changes out for some chips, he pulls the chair out for me at the Blackjack table. Of course, I have no clue what’s happening, but Jax’s face becomes serious. I love that face, too. When the cards are dealt again, I tell him I’m going over to the slots. I slide in some cash and become hypnotized by the spinning fruits.

I have no clue how long I sit there, but Jax grabs my hand and pulls me away to the steakhouse that’s nestled inside the casino.

“I’m hungry,” he moans close to my ear.

Dinner goes perfectly. We laugh, eat way too much food, and I've had too many glasses of wine, but it’s the best time we’ve had in months. We’re standing by the valet booth, waiting for the Mustang, and the biggest smile is still across on my face. This is what we needed. I can feel our connection growing. The Mustang pulls up when I hear a voice call me.